Been struggling to make your lady squirt? I’ve got you! I have laid out all you need to know about yoni massage and how to make her squirt. Try these tips!
Are you curious about making your woman squirt through a tantric practice?
If so, a yoni massage is the way to go.
It’s not just any sexy massage. With yoni, you can connect to your partner on a personal level and align your universal sexual chi or energy that extends.
If you’re curious to try this intimate massage with your lady, read on to know all about yoni massage (and how to make her squirt with it).
1. Know what a yoni massage is
First, you need to understand what a yoni massage is so you can correctly perform it with your partner. You can’t drive stick if you don’t know what a stick is—literally and (sexually) figuratively. 😉
“Yoni” is a Sanskrit word for vagina, and it translates to “a sacred space.”
A yoni massage is a type of tantric and sensual massage that involves massaging the vagina. Its approach treats the vagina as a revered part of the female body worthy of respect and honor.
One of its purposes is to help women (and couples) explore, understand, and feel more comfortable with their bodies.
That means while it is SENSUAL, it doesn’t necessarily have to be SEXUAL.
It’s not about sex or foreplay. But it could be—if you do it with your partner. *wink*
Yes, yoni massage is a type of vaginal massage. But it doesn’t only involve the vag, period. It also targets other sensitive or erogenous zones of your lady’s body like her vulva, breasts, and stomach.
Who can perform a yoni massage?
- A man to a woman
- A woman to a woman
A trained practitioner typically performs a yoni massage. However, you can also give it to your partner once you learn the basics of this tantric massage.
Your partner, or the receiver, has a role to play as well.
For example, during the massage session, they must focus on breathing exercises. This is a way for them to understand and determine what sensations feel good to them and release any mental and physical tensions.
Benefits for Women
Orgasms, or multiple orgasms, are possible during the massage. However, they’re not the sole purpose or the main goal. Aside from the advantages we mentioned above, here are more benefits of yoni massage for the woman:
- Improving the sexual experience – This practice deepens you and your partner’s intimate bond. If she fears intimacy or experiencing a low sex drive, this is an excellent way to reignite passion by deepening the sense of trust and connection.
- Achieving orgasm – Many women have a hard time reaching orgasm. A yoni massage helps her relax and focus on the pleasurable sensations you perform on her body. By letting go of stress and inhibitions, she can allow herself to experience climax more quickly.
- Overcoming trauma – She can achieve healing from traumatic experiences through mental relaxation.
Benefits for Men
What is it for you as the designated person who gives the massage? There are benefits for you as well.
- Support your partner – The receiver gains many benefits from a yoni massage. And as the giver, you will be supporting your partner with it. She can be healthier and happier, which is just as fulfilling for you not only sexually but also for your entire well-being.
- Better sex – Through a yoni massage, your partner can learn more about what feels good for her. And you will learn what to do to make her feel good. With this, you can apply those learnings during foreplay and sex, improving the overall sexual experience.
- Enhance intimate connection – Exploring her body—and her letting YOU explore HER body—takes a lot of vulnerability and trust. This experience deepens your connection by learning about each other better and being more in-tune with each other.
- Practice unconditional love – When you give your partner a yoni massage, you don’t expect anything in return. It’s a practice that celebrates HER—to make her feel your love and adoration. The act of giving can be very advantageous for your own well-being.
Curious? Let’s go!
2. Prepare your and your partner’s headspace
Tantric practices are often associated with anything “sexual.” But it extends beyond sex. In fact, it’s more about the connection between you and your partner.
If it’s your first few times indulging in a tantric practice like a yoni massage, preparing your mind is one thing you should focus early on.
The most important things about tantra are physical and spiritual awareness.
That means being in tune with your body—knowing what is pleasurable and identifying how it’s pleasurable. This is something your partner should essentially achieve from this practice.
As a couple, your goal would be to build a deeper and more harmonious connection. Therefore, it’s essential to be physically and spiritually aware of each other’s energy before, during, and after sex.
So how should you and your partner prepare for it? Here are some tips:
- Talk to your partner about each other’s sex life. Be open about how you think you can improve your sexual experience in the relationship and listen to what they have to say. Go slow and try not to overwhelm your partner with information.
- Listen to your partner actively. Your partner might not be into practicing it, or they might be hesitant to explore it. Regardless of their reaction, be respectful and carefully listen. If they have questions, try your best to answer them.
- Do breathing exercises. This actually helps big time. Before the massage session, warm up with breathing exercises. Inhale and exhale in slow and deep breaths. Feel as you force the air into and out of your belly. During the practice, have your partner maintain these breathing techniques.
3. Set the space
It could be anywhere—your bed, on the floor, a different piece of furniture. The yoni massage doesn’t require you to be in a spa-like space.
What’s important is that it’s inviting and comforting.
Create a relaxing ambiance in your space by following these tips:
- Comfortable room temperature – A warm space is more inviting for massage sessions as she will be naked. If it’s too cold, she won’t be able to enjoy and focus on the sensations. At the same time, you don’t want the room to be too hot that she (and YOU) will be dripping in sweat.
- Dim lights – The bright light from the fluorescent light is far from relaxing. They’re for studying and working. That’s why spas usually have dim lights. Warm light is always best for a calming atmosphere, and one of the best ways to go is by lighting candles! The flickering light even casts a sensual glow on her body.
- Aromatherapy – Taking a step further with your candles, opt for scented candles for aromatherapy. You can go for relaxing scents (like lavender) or a more aphrodisiac one (like ylang-ylang).
- No clutter, please. Scattered trash, unpiled clothes, and knocked-down books are stressful to look at. Opposite of “relaxation,” if you ask me. Remove and clean these distractions from the room so you and your partner can genuinely remove your mind from life’s daily stresses.
- Log off the tech. Nothing can take you out of the moment more than hearing your Zoom notification or Slack ping. Ugh, even remembering those sounds sends trigger warnings. Be in the moment for your tantric massage session by turning your devices silent and in Do Not Disturb for a few hours.
4. Warm up with a breast massage
Just because yoni massage is a vaginal massage doesn’t mean you should dive straight to the vajayjay. Repeat after me: anticipation is key for any type of sexy massage.
There are many types of lubricants to choose from (see here). Some of the most popular are lotions, essential oils, and massage oils. They may even come with aromatherapy benefits based on your selected fragrance.
But I suggest you try using massage candles. They work like regular candles but melt into the skin as it dries instead of hardening. Plus, they also contain natural and hydrating ingredients like jojoba and coconut oils.
Start by massaging the breast region
Pour your chosen oil into your hands and then slowly run your hands at her breast region.
Rub your hands together to warm the oil!
Go for long and slow strokes. Let your hands travel down to her tummy and navel area. Work your way along the ribs, between the breasts, across the lower abdomen, and along the rib cage.
These regions are dense with nerve endings that would surely wake up and heighten her senses.
What’s the right pressure? It’s always best to go for mild pressure. It should be not too light and feathery to be ticklish. But it should also be not too tight to feel painful.
Move on to nipple play
Her nipples are very sensitive, and the stimulation from her erogenous zones would likely make her nips erect and ready.
At this point, you can notice that her body is warmed up, and her nipples are begging to be touched.
Caress her areola or lightly trace your finger along it. This very simple touch could make her squirm.
You can proceed in massaging her nipples by kneading, caressing, and lightly pinching the nips.
Something to note
Be attentive to her reactions if she’s enjoying it or nah.
For example, some women may find overstimulating the nipples turns them off, while others love it so much that they orgasm simply from nipple play (without penetration!).
5. Finally—the yoni massage
Now it’s time to go to the lady bits.
These are yoni massage techniques you can try.
You can start by circling AROUND the clitoris (not directly touching it) with the tip of your fingers. Do these strokes using two or three fingers. You can circle in clockwise and counterclockwise motions.
Try to vary the size of the circles you make between small and tight circular movements to large circles.
Pay attention to the pressure and pacing of your movements.
The woman’s clitoral hood is dense with nerve endings. The clitoris, for one, can be too sensitive, depending on your woman’s threshold. Usually, it feels good to stimulate the clit without direct contact.
When you do your circles, be careful you keep the clitoral hood closed. If you do it roughly, you might reveal the clit, which might not yet be ready for stimulation.
Push and pull
With your left index finger and right index finger, hold the clitoral hood on both sides. Do the push and pull motion gently, retracting the clitoris in and out.
Make small pulsing movements as you do the motions. This is a good opening to reveal the clit and prepare it for contact.
Something to note
Start sloooow. Apply gentle pressure on each side of the clitoral hood.
High levels of pressure could feel uncomfortable for the woman, especially at the top of the clitoral hood. This movement is also quite intense, so you don’t really need too much pressure for it to feel good.
Then, when you can sense it’s time to intensify the massage, you can speed up at the right moment. You can experiment with pressure to heighten the sensations.
Tug and roll
This movement is simple to do. You just place a finger on each side of the clit. Then, tug. Easy-peasy!
Okay, here’s a bit more detailed instructions:
- First, hold the clitoris GENTLY on each side and have it between your thumb and index finger.
- Then, tug the clitoris away from her body… and release it.
- You can also tug the vaginal lips the same way and release.
It’s best to alternate the areas and pressure during tugging.
Next is to roll it, baby!
Basically, you hold the clit the same way as tugging using your thumb and index finger. You can then rub the clitoris between your fingers slowly and gently. The motion is similar to when you try to snap your fingers.
Shape your hand like a cup and then hold it over the vag, sort of like you’re wrapping your hands around it. Then, move your hand in a circular motion.
After some time, start flattening your hand against the vaginal opening. Next, use the palm of your entire hand to massage the entire vaginal area.
The great thing about this technique is that you can stimulate the entire region instead of focusing on just one spot. Thus, you can truly cover all the bases for a complete yoni massage.
Love Thy Labia
When giving a yoni massage, you must pay attention to the ENTIRE vaginal area. That means you should give love to the labia!
The labia is often referred to as the “vaginal lips.” This is the part that you can see.
It has two parts—labia majora (that fleshy outer lips of the vulva) and labia minora (the inner lips that lead the way to the vaginal opening).
TBH, the labia look different from woman to woman. Some have asymmetrical inner lips; others have prominent outer lips. ESSENTIALLY, there’s no “normal” or single definition of how they look.
Massaging the labia is simple: trace your fingers around each lip. Make sure to touch each nook and cranny WHILE being gentle.
It’s important to note that orgasm is not the end goal for a yoni massage. Your partner could orgasm from the stimulation, but it’s not a requirement.
However, if she wants to reach the Big O, you can stimulate her in a way that helps her climax.
To do so, combine all the techniques we mentioned so far. How?
- Stimulate multiple erogenous areas at the same time.
- Work your way from the top of the vagina, down to the bottom, across the clit, beyond the labia, and into the vaginal opening.
- From the bottom, you can move back up again.
- Repeat and do it simultaneously again and again.
- To increase the intensity, you can ramp up the pressure and speed.
Try two-handed movements.
For example, one hand massages her clit while the other rubs on her vaginal lips. At the same time, sync your movements on both hands. This gives her all the good stimulations simultaneously.
Meanwhile, if she wants to be stimulated internally, you can also opt for the next and final technique…
Consider checking out our best sex tips for men guide to take your game to a new level.
The final yoni massage technique is massaging the G-spot. But it’s an entire step that requires its own separate section.
At this point, you move on from the external clitoris and go massage her INSIDE.
Hint: This is when and how you can make her squirt.
First of all, make sure she’s OK with penetration. She might be expecting only a regular massage (meaning: external) in the pussy, but not necessarily an internal massage as well. If she gives the green light, then move forward.
How to massage the G-spot
- Find the G-spot by curving your first two fingers into the letter C. Then, slide your fingers gently into the vaginal opening.
- You can locate the G-spot by feeling a slightly ridged spot at the top of the vaginal wall. It’s not too deep—just an inch or two (or three) into the vagina. But it’s fairly shallow, so even the woman can stimulate it on her own if she decides to try the yoni massage by herself. The more aroused she is, the more pronounced this spot becomes. So, make sure to stimulate her thoroughly before going into this step.
- Curve your fingers, then massage the G-spot with a “come hither” motion. Stimulating this spot is essential—whether that’s by tapping or making circular motions. The in-and-out movement of penetration is not entirely needed for this.
On top of the internal stimulation, massage the external clit as well at the same time or put pressure on or above the pubic bone.
This heightens the sensations and makes the massage more effective.
Making her squirt
A vaginal massage like the yoni massage is an effective way to make a woman squirt if it’s something you and your partner are exploring. The most important thing to do is provide pressure to the G-spot area. Here’s how:
- Pushing – Repeatedly press the G-spot with your finger.
- Rubbing – Rub the G-spot in a circular motion while maintaining pressure on the fingertip.
- Come hither – The “beckoning” motion is super effective—curling and straightening the finger is so stimulating.
- Arm shaking – Combining the three techniques above, but this time, you use your entire arm. Your fingers should be in place, applying pressure to the G-spot, then shake your entire arm stiffly.
These techniques are sure-fire ways to make her squirt during a yoni massage.
7. Try edging
Edging is a practice of stopping your partner from reaching her orgasm RIGHT when they’re about to. They’re literally on the “edge” before falling into the cliff of the Big O.
The yoni massage is the perfect opportunity to practice this, as yoni massages aren’t a race to orgasm. Instead, it’s an act that takes things slow, letting your partner indulge in the sensations and feeling e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.
And that’s basically what edging is as well—stopping the stimulation before cumming, waiting for a few moments, restarting the stimulation again, and then repeating the process.
Another thing to know about yoni massage is that it’s great for your partner to experience waves of multiple orgasms instead of just one.
Edging helps as you can stop when her body is ready to explode, slow down, pull away, then build up the sensation again, so she gets waves and waves of orgasms.
During your cool-down periods, use the time to place your hand on her heart.
This act keeps your bodies grounded and lets you feel connected as you share loving energy.
A yoni massage should be celebrated. So end it by expressing gratitude to your partner (and her to you).
It is a healing practice that involves sexual exploration. Share with each other what you’ve learned, how you felt, and what you’ve both achieved from the experience.
Then, lay down with your partner to exchange and weave energies. Cuddling nurtures a deep connection.
Go for the spooning position with the giver (you) as the big spoon that sends the energy while the receiver (her) is the small spoon in front that absorbs the energy.
Align your hearts and stomachs as you snuggle closely. Then, lay still for a few quiet moments and harmonize your breathing. This creates a harmonious flow of energy between you and your partner.
If yoni massages and other tantric practices piqued your interest, you could learn more by seeking professional tantra teachers. Unfortunately, there’s no official certification for professionals in tantric yoni massage, but you can look for experts who can guide you professionally and in an enlightened way.