Anal Orgasm 101: How To Have Your First One (Male & Female)

Learn how to cum from anal for the first time! In this guide, we’ll help you with the hows, whys, and whats of anal orgasm plus exact steps on how to cum from anal. Read on:

Anal Orgasm 101

Each pursed bumhole and sphincter is worth exploring. And it truly feels fan-tASS-tic.

You can’t become an anal aficionado overnight, so training is key. The great thing is that it’s a pleasurable use of time in figuring out what feels good and what can feel even better during the sessions.

From understanding what is an anal orgasm to various tips on how to achieve anal orgasm (and the best positions and techniques for it), we’ll tackle the A to Zs of anal orgasm in this article.


What is an anal orgasm, exactly?

An anal orgasm is exactly what you think it is and what it sounds like. It’s an orgasm achieved through stimulating the anus, rectum, butt cheeks, prostate (if present), and basically the entire booty area.

What are those anal stimulations? Well, that varies. As long as it feels good, that’s it. But to give you an idea, it could be penetration (using a penis or a sex toy), fingering, licking, etc.

The anus is packed with nerve endings.

As a result, sensations and pleasure feel different for everybody, and what’s great is that there are countless ways to stimulate thy butt for thy orgasm.


Who can orgasm anally?

If you have a butt, you can try butt play. That means EVERYONE can do it – as long they’re interested, of course.

Anal Orgasm for Men, or People with a Penis

Men, or people who are assigned male at birth, have a prostate. And for them, stimulating the prostate can lead to anal orgasm.

The prostate is a walnut-sized gland tucked in at around 2 to 3 inches inside the anus. It sits between the bladder and the rectum. 

The prostate gland is one of the most sensitive and pleasurable spots in a man’s body. It’s surrounded by nerve endings and is actually where the male’s body produces the fluid (aka semen) during ejaculation. 

So you can already guess how stimulating the prostate can lead to very intense, mind-blowing orgasms. 

That’s why it’s also sometimes referred to as the male G-spot or P-spot. In fact, you can stimulate your prostate using fingers just as you would the G-spot in a woman.

You can still play with it externally through the perineum if you’re not into direct touch. This is the patch of skin in between the anus and the testicles.

Anal Orgasm for Women, or People with a Vulva

Women, or people assigned female at birth, don’t have a prostate. Does that mean they can’t orgasm from anal play? Nope! You can. It just works a bit differently.

If men have the P-spot, women have the A-spot. It’s the anterior fornix and is located deeper inside the vagina. (It’s deeper than the G-spot.) You can reach it around 5 to 6 inches in.

This area also has a lot of nerve endings, so stimulating it can make a woman very wet. As it’s deep in the vag, anal play comes into play as you reach it as well through the backdoor.

Anal penetration feels great for women because it can stimulate both the G-spot (located at the front wall of the vagina) and the A-spot (which is closer to the cervix but also sits at the vag front wall).

Plus, the anus is surrounded by sensitive nerves, especially the pudendal nerve, which is actually near the sphincter. That’s why rimming can feel really good to a girl.


BONUS TIP: Check out this useful video from School of Squirt if you want your girl to experience INTENSE deep spot, anal orgasms regularly. You’ll learn all the mindsets and techniques needed to do these like a pro – all the techniques are demonstrated live as well.


Techniques To Reach Anal Orgasm

With your finger/s

Fingering is one of the best ways to explore anal play. It’s not too big, too long, or too thick. It’s NOT INTIMIDATING at all.

The finger also gives you enough control. Plus, it’s just right there! So you don’t need to buy anything. And it’s pleasurable. I mean, the list is endless.

The only thing you have to be mindful of is your fingernails. When you’re poking around your partner’s butt, they could stab them. So trim your nails OR wear a medical glove OR use a condom on your fingers.

Something to note

If you have long fingernails and you don’t want to trim them, you can put a cotton ball at the tip of your nails while wearing the glove.


With your tongue

Anal play doesn’t always require anal penetration. You don’t always have to stimulate the P-spot or the A-spot directly.

One thing you can do is make the most out of the perianal area using your tongue. This technique is also called rimming or analingus. It involves licking, sucking, kissing, and basically any oral-to-anal play.

This highly intimate act is worth adding to your sexual adventures. Of course, it’s essential to be safe and clean before getting down and dirty. There are still bacteria in the anus, after all.

But don’t worry. For the most part, it’s safe. 


With butt plugs

Incorporating sex toys is always worth exploring with anal orgasm. And one of the most popular toys, in this case, is butt plugs.

Usually, it has a teardrop shape. It tapers from the tip for easier insertion and then goes wider at its body. And as with any anal toy, it has a flared base that anchors it outside of your anus so it doesn’t get sucked in all the way to the point of no return.

Females and males can enjoy butt plugs as the backdoor has a chokehold of nerves. They can be used during vaginal penetration, worn in public, or stretching.


With anal beads

Anal beads play a different role during anal play. Butt plugs give the feeling of pressure and fullness. It’s meant to stay in place and is often used to prepare for penetrative anal sex.

Meanwhile, anal beads are designed for movement. This toy has multiple spheres along a cord that are usually in different sizes, and it’s shaped to arouse the sensitive nerve endings in the sphincter muscle when it’s pulled out.

That’s why most anal beads you can find have a loop where you grip on for inserting and pulling it out.

It really goes POP-POP-POP, which feels very pleasurable.


Dildo

When you and your butthole are ready to size up, dildos are the next step up.

You can go for most dildos for anal penetration. But many are made specifically for anal use. For example, it’s designed and curved to hit the P-spot specifically.

Something to note

A flared base is one of the more important aspects of shopping for a dildo for anal play.

As I mentioned above, the base should be wider than the thickest part of the dildo to prevent the toy from getting sucked in the ass. Believe it or not, your anus is quite powerful enough to do so.


With prostate massagers

Prostate toys are specifically designed to stimulate the prostate, so it’s more intended for penis owners. But, of course, any sex toy can work as a prostate sex toy if it has the right shape.

For example, LELO’s Loki is one of the most famous prostate massagers among men, thanks to its powerful vibrations and handy grip.

Lelo Loki

Meanwhile, a prostate toy can be in the form of a prostate milking tool with three arms. The middle arm goes inside while the two arms sit outside, stimulating the perineum.

The Aneros Helix Syn Trident is one. What’s great about this toy is you can use it hands-free. It stays firm in your ass securely, and then you can rock your body to self-administer prostate massage!

Aneros Helix Syn Trident


With strap-on sex

Couples who want to explore anal penetration for the man can switch roles if one is a woman. How? By using strap-on dildos, of course.

Also called pegging, the woman dons a strap-on to penetrate the man anally. It flips the script where the woman is the one penetrating the man, and the man can enjoy anal stimulation as well.

There is an entire kit involved for this sextivity. Many variations and options are out there, but the basics you need are:

  • Harness
  • Dildo
  • Lube

The harness can be underwear-style or strap-on. You can buy a kit that includes everything or buy each piece individually.

Personally, I like having options, so I get a harness and dildo separately. That will leave me more room to experiment and use different dildos in the future as well.

Something to note

When it comes to dildos, you should look for the feature: harness compatibility. This means the dildo can be used for your harness, especially if it has replaceable O-rings.


Anal sex

Technically, anal sex could be a finger, sex toy, or tongue. But, in this section, we’re talking about the penis-in-anus anal sex.

It’s the ultimate penetrative anal sex act for a couple.

There are many sex positions you can explore if you’re testing the waters for anal sex, which we’ll discuss in a bit. But, for now, let’s talk about what you need to know before doin’ the deed.

The first is ANAL TRAINING.

Usually, you’d need to have your anus ready to be penetrated by the peen. That means a couple of anal play sessions before working your way to the penis. That said, anal training also involves stretching and readying the anus with a finger, butt plug, or anal beads for the sphincter to relax.

Next, lube up. Lubricants will be your best friend for anal play. Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn’t self-lubricate. It will be easier and more pleasurable when it glides in easily. Swear.


Double penetration

Double penetration, also called DP for short, might usually be a porn fantasy you’d only see in adult videos. 

It basically means a person (usually a woman) is penetrated at the same time in two of their orifices – the vagina and anus. The mouth could join in the fun as well.

So you might think, THREESOME! Well, not really. (But if you and your partner are open to that, then, by all means…)

But you can definitely try DP without having an extra human being in the room. HOW? Sex toys!

Women feel fuller when both of their holes are inserted with something. And the additional stimulation also makes anal sex more pleasurable. Plus, you can add in vibrations from a sex toy, perhaps. 


15 Best Sex Positions for Anal Orgasm

The best sex positions for anal sex from beginner to advanced levels.

BEGINNER

1. Perch

Something to note

Just to simplify instructions, the male is doing the penetration while the woman is being penetrated.

Of course, you could switch roles or be a male-to-male couple when doing it.

How to do it: Male sits on the edge of the chair or bed. Female sits on top of him, facing the same way (her back to him).

It’s so easy to pull off, and it’s self-explanatory. The rider has control over the penetration. The one penetrating can easily use his hands to touch her other regions.


2. Flat Doggy

How to do it: Female lies down flat on her stomach. Male lies down directly on top of her, facing the same way. 

Most of the yummy nerves in the anus aren’t too deep – even rimming feels great. So you can definitely try this position as it allows for shallow penetration. This is easy to do and good for dipping your toes into if you’re not yet ready to go all the way.


3. Missionary

How to do it: You KNOW missionary. Female lies down. Male on top of her. In this case, the male enters the backdoor. 

The fun about doing missionary for anal is that you can be intimate and look into each other’s eyes. Anal positions always have you facing the other way.


4. Leg Thrust

How to do it: Like spooning, but seated. Male sits on the bed as the female positions herself in between his lap while seated.

It’s an intimate position, yet still very comfortable. You can also easily twist around to kiss your partner for more romance. 


5. Cross

How to do it: Female lies on her side on the edge of the bed. Her back facing the male. Male stands on the floor and penetrates her anally.

It’s a shallow penetration that introduces new sensations to the play. Since the guy is standing, he can easily switch the depth and direction of how he thrusts in and out.


6. Spoon

How to do it: Both lie on their sides while facing the same direction. Entering from behind is very easy for anal.

You might not have eye-to-eye contact on this move, but you get skin-to-skin contact. In itself, it is very hot and sweet. This position also allows nice foreplay by rubbing your behind on his penis.


7. Doggy

How to do it: Of course, you can’t talk about anal without going for the doggy position. She’s on all fours while the guy enters her from behind. There are also different variations for this position for more stimulation.

It’s popular for a reason: easy access to the butt.


INTERMEDIATE

8. Rider on Top / Cowgirl

How to do it: Male lies down on his back with his knees slightly bent. Female straddles him and slowly slides his penis on her asshole. She can lean forward for more control of her thrusting.

The rider-on-top position gives the rider a lot of control over the penetration. It also leaves your hands free to touch yourself anywhere you like, making it one of the best moves for reaching anal orgasm.


9. Yogi

How to do it: Male sits on the bed or floor with his legs crossed. The female sits on his lap and wraps her legs around his waist. They can rock together in this position.

With your bodies so close to each other, this position is one of the most romantic and intimate. You have full skin-to-skin contact, and you can look at each other’s eyes passionately as you rock.


10. Reverse Rider on Top

How to do it: Male lies down on his back. Female straddles him while facing away. It’s like the doggy position. But the male is lying down, and the female has more control of the thrusting.

It’s easy access to the ass and gives plenty of view to the ass. A great position for butt lovers! 

The girl, or the one being penetrated, is in control. The person penetrating can then participate by squeezing in her buttcheeks or massaging the butt area using his hands or toys.


11. Spork

How to do it: The female lies on her side and raises her leg. The male positions in between her legs at a 90-degree angle. This allows for side entry to the backdoor.

Spork is always hot, regardless of which type of penetration you’re going for. With anal, it’s even spicier. You can look at each other’s eyes and be very close to each other physically. The twisted angle also introduces unique sensations.


ADVANCED

12. Standing Doggy

How to do it: Both of you stand facing the same way. Male stands at the female’s back. She then bends over her waist while he holds her hips or wrists as he enters her anally.

It’s also called the Eiffel Tower position. The person being penetrated bends down on their waist while the one penetrating stands upright, creating a similar silhouette of the famous Parisian landmark.

The challenge here is balancing and good flexibility for the female. It’s great for deep anal penetration.


13. Hamstring Stretch

How to do it: Female lies on her back. Having a pillow or wedge for support on her lower back makes this position easier and offers easier access to her anus. Male positions to penetrate her, while she rests her legs up on her partner’s shoulders.

The woman would need to stretch before doing this position, requiring more flexibility. But it offers love to deep penetration on the anus, so it’s a must-try.


14. Butter Churner

How to do it: Woman partner lies down on her back. She then raises her legs ABOVE her head, also raising her hips along the way. Male squats on the back of her legs, penetrating her from above.

It’s an extreme position, so only advanced players should try this. She will only be using her head and shoulders for support as the rest of her body is raised up. It gives the man total control of the thrusting, making it popular for BDSM plays.


15. Clean and Jerk

How to do it: This position requires trust and teamwork. Male lies on his back. Female goes down onto him, facing the other way. Simple enough, but the key here is that the male CARRIES the female to thrust into him with his hands on her thighs. She can only support her weight with her arms.

It’s a pretty ambitious move but fun to explore. The guy would need to have a seriously strong upper body. Plus, you would need to have a stable bed for this. Avoid slippery tiles.


How to Have An Anal Orgasm

1. Be in the right headspace.

Feeling tense and anxious can lead to your anus being tense and anxious. This is because it would close up more, making any stimulation feel weird or unpleasant.

Like any type of play, it’s all in the mind. If you think you will feel pain, you’re most likely to feel pain.

It’s normal to be weirded out at first. But if you’re interested in exploring anal play, start by letting go of the notion that your anus is a dirty or forbidden place.


2. Use lube – and lots of it!

Think you’ve used enough? Add some more. Lube is NOT optional when it comes to any type of anal play.

Lubricants protect you from having small tears in your anal lining and irritation. Plus, they heighten the sensations.

How to apply lube?

  • Apply it outside of the anus,
  • On your sex toy or your partner’s penis, and/or
  • Use a lube tube to insert lube into your anus.

3. Start small

Massaging the opening of the anus already feels pleasurable. This along could lead to anal orgasm.

When you’re ready to put SOMETHING in, start small. Using fingers is the best way to ease your way in. You may also go for toys with a similar finger-width to stretch it out and get ready for the peen.


4. Communicate, communicate, communicate

If you are the one being penetrated, don’t be shy about being vocal about how you feel. You can’t always get it right the first time. Feel free to make requests.

This is really the key to anal orgasm.

Your partner isn’t a mind reader. So communicating is the way to get the right strokes, pressure, intensity, rhythm, and depth that feels best to you. It also helps you relax more as you control the situation and know your partner hears you.


5. Don’t neglect the butthole

When people say “anal,” most would think penetration. So they’d prep for it and focus entirely on it. Buttt the butthole is a hotspot that deserves extra attention.

It’s packed with nerve endings, just like the G-spot and clit. So, yup, play with it for yummy sensations.


6. Breathe in, breathe out

You might not notice it, but you hold your breath and clench your (anal) muscles when you’re bracing for impact. Taking deep breaths helps your mind and body relax and bask in the sensations.

Something to note

The more relaxed you are, the easier it would be for your partner to penetrate you anally.

And the more you will enjoy the experience, helping you reach an anal O.


7. Unclench the anus

Training your sphincter to relax is important. The natural response of your sphincter is to tighten when it senses something going in or touching it. It won’t allow penetration when it’s closed up.

Even when it’s in, you might feel it resist. Breathe deeply and relax when this occurs.

You can train your sphincters to relax with butt plugs and prostate massagers so it gets used to the feeling of something in it.


8. Mix and match

Anal play doesn’t have to be a standalone menu. You can pair it with vaginal or penile stimulation to make the course more interesting.

It’s different for each person. Some are sensitive and don’t want OVERstimulating their sensitive parts. For others, they can’t orgasm from one stimulation alone.

Double the pleasure to double the fun. Add anal beads or a butt plug or do anal play with oral sex, penetration, or hand play. Have f-u-n!


What does an anal orgasm feel like?

Anal orgasm feels different from one person to another. While it does feel good, many people have different reasons for doing it. But what makes anal sex pleasurable, especially for women, considering they have a vagina where the guy can insert their penis in?

For one, it’s the intimacy. Another is the kink. Anal sex is quite a taboo, so there’s an extra thrill when doing it.

At the same time, it gives you another level of connection with your partner.

Does an anal orgasm feel different from a vaginal or clitoral orgasm?

Truly, it depends on the person.

In many ways, the rush and buildup feel pretty similar. However, the orgasm itself could vary.

For one, clitoral orgasms can be quick and sharp. And since the clit is very sensitive, she might want to stop and not like you stimulating her clitoris as it could hurt.

Vaginal orgasms are more like vaginal contractions.

Meanwhile, anal orgasms feel like they could go on longer. But it’s also like getting high and a spike of euphoria that she’ll feel wanton from exhaustion after.

It gives you intense waves of pleasure from somewhere deep and then resonates with the rest of your body. In short, a-ma-zing.

Again, it’s different from person to person. So it’s really something you should try for yourself to see if it’s pleasurable for you or not.


Frequently Asked Questions about anal orgasm

I know you still have questions. So, here are some answers for you.

Is anal sex painful?

Anal sex should n-e-v-e-r be painful. It is normal to feel a little discomfort, though. Your anus isn’t used to getting something inside and will try to resist. However, you can train your anus to relax, especially when you’re aroused.


Is bleeding normal?

The anus might bleed, especially the first time. If it’s only a tiny amount of blood, you shouldn’t worry too much. However, you should figure out what’s the cause. Usually, it happens from tearing in the skin due to friction if there wasn’t enough lube used. So, next time, apply lots and lots of lube.

But (!) if you’re experiencing heavy or continuous bleeding, that’s NOT normal. Stop and reach out to healthcare personnel immediately.


As a man, am I gay if I orgasm from anal play?

Nope, anal orgasm doesn’t make you gay. Unlike what other people think, anal sex is not just for the queer. Straight men and women can enjoy the unique waves of pleasure this sex play offers.


What are the risks of anal sex?

Like any activity, there can be risks. But there are ways for you to prevent them:

  • STIs – It’s possible to transmit infections and diseases like HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes. You can use condoms (and use them correctly), get frequent STI testing, and be open with your partner about STIs, your results, and testing.
  • Anal fissures – The anus may have tiny tears along its lining due to this act. Sometimes, they can be deep enough to be painful. You might also notice a bit of bleeding or some redness in your bowel movement. This can heal after a few weeks usually. So, again, use lube to prevent this.
  • Colon perforation – It’s pretty rare, but it can happen. Some of the things you should be careful about are abdominal pain and rectal bleeding. Head to the emergency room if you notice any symptoms.

Will anal sex affect my ability to poop?

Nope! It won’t affect your ability to poop and hold your poop in. Some who are training and stretching their anus might feel like their anus isn’t as “tight.” But it doesn’t actually affect bowel movements.

However, the sex act could make you feel like you’re about to poop during or after anal play. 


Conclusion

Anal orgasms are loads of fun to do and explore.

They’re something you can add to your repertoire of sexy and kinky things to try. And even if you don’t reach an orgasm, you’ll most likely still get to enjoy the new sensations introduced during the play.

So, it’s still worth it!

Dainis Graveris

Dainis Graveris

Over last 4 years Dainis have helped millions of people through his advice on this site (200+ guides and 1M+ visits/monthly). His work & advice has appeared on sites like: Healthline, Vice, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health, WomensHealthMag, MindBodyGreen & more. Read More

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