Prostate orgasm is unlike any other feeling in a man’s body.
When I first experienced it I thought to myself:
“I’m never leaving bed again."
Suddenly all my orgasms from good, old-fashioned hetero sex and self-pleasuring seemed so pedestrian.
As a straight male, I say to you:
“This is an adventure you want to take at least once.”
In this post, you’ll learn the exact prostate milking methods that I acquired through trial and error. I’ve read books, practiced a bunch and over time perfected the techniques.
My intention is to give you a definitive step by step guide to achieving mind-blowing prostate orgasms.
And did I say there are tons of health benefits that come with prostate massage?
Instead of one, you’ll have two sources of unique pleasure!
And quite possibly have the most intense orgasm you’ve ever had in your life.
Most men settle only for 50% of the pleasure, never even exploring the prostate play!
But not you…
You are here curious and wondering...
Here are just a few comments of men describing how prostate milking feels like:
- “Prostate stimulation can be otherworldly, like you are not sure where the pleasure is coming from. Penis stimulation, now, while still nice, is more to the point.”
- “Totally different. [Prostate stimulation feels] duller and less intense in the sense of concentrated excitement, but very powerful and intense in a more full-body experience way.”
- “It is a deeper, fuller, more encompassing pleasure, radiating from within the body instead of feeling like external stimulation.”
- “Penile stimulation is about certain external ‘hot spots,’ while prostate stimulation is all internal.”
Use the arrow on the right bottom and quick navigation to jump around quickly.
At first I answer the most pressing questions before diving into exact prostate milking steps.
If something is missing, let me know in comments!
There are so many misconceptions around anal play.
Most men cannot imagine how anyone on receiving end would enjoy anal stimulation.
There are also those fears lingering...
- Won’t it make me gay…? Weird?
- Make me less masculine?
- Real men don’t do it?
If you look at these questions for what they are, you’ll understand its just insecurity, taboo, and misinformation.
Liking how something feels in your ass does not make you gay! Same as enjoying self-pleasuring doesn't make you gay!
Your sexual orientation happens in the brain! If you’re aroused to woman’s body, anal play won’t change that.
I should know. I thought the same.
For years, I thought that anal play is only for gay couples and never even went close to my own butt.
But truth is, men have a lot more reasons to enjoy anal play than ladies!
We have a frikin’ P-Spot there, while women just have bits of erectile tissue.
After learning about the anatomy, and understanding how to pleasure my prostate painlessly I was thunderstruck…
For so many years I had this source of pleasure that I didn’t know existed!
Prostate Massage: Health Benefits
Prostate massage isn't just for fun.
Originally it was actually recommended by doctors as an aid to prevent a prostate cancer.
The company that made prostate massagers (Aneros) in the 1990s discovered that men started using them more from pleasure than medical treatment.
That’s how the sex toy and prostate milking was born.
Another benefit is that you also automatically train your PC pelvic floor muscles, that are necessary for penis health.
When you use prostate massager, you’ll contract and relax PC muscles as a way to feel the pleasure.
Win / Win. Sometimes health and pleasure go together!
What Does A Prostate Orgasm Feel Like?
Cock play and prostate play can both be intensely pleasurable, but many men and I have been struck by how distinctly different these two sensations feel.
Prostate orgasm is probably the easiest way for men to have whole body orgasmic experience.
Oh, and you’ll probably won’t even ejaculate!
When you have dry, prostate orgasms, you can have as many of those bad boys as you want!
Instead of 5-10 second genital experience having 30-60 second earth-shattering whole body orgasm?
What’s even better:
Every next orgasm will be even more intense and easier to achieve.
As for sensations, for every man it will be different.
You won’t know how it really feels until you try.
But for me, a prostate orgasm was a true whole body experience.
I’m working on rotating sexual energy in my regular self-pleasuring sessions, but this was a whole new world.
Penile orgasm originates in genitals, but prostate orgasm felt like coming deep within the body and when it hit it was totally overwhelming and beyond this world experience.
But don’t take my word for it..!
Here are some other men impressions:
"When it hit, it fucking hit.
A wave smashing into my groin, wave after wave smashing over the rest of my body. My skin felt super receptive. I felt every hair follicle on my scalp, and I felt a pressure building again.
I had ended up groaning again, quite loudly, and shot across the room. Multiple volleys of semen flew across the room, managing to hit the opposite wall.
When it was over I was still quivering. Gasping for air and trying not to touch my body. I grazed my nipples and nearly had a seizure. I cleaned myself off after 10 minutes trying to regain my composure. When I stood up I couldn't walk. My knees were quivering with exhaustion.
It was intense beyond intense. Do try it.”
- Source: Reddit
“Within 30 seconds, I started to feel like I couldn't hold my bladder anymore, but I knew from a little research this morning that feeling was false, and was really my prostate.
I kept up with the stimulation, was not terribly vigorous, and within another 30 seconds, my body completely took over and I felt this warm rush of fluid evacuating itself from my pelvis through my urethra.
I have a momentary freakout thinking I've urinated on my bed, I look down, and see the most humongous load I've ever seen, no urine in sight.
I convulsed there for a good minute, feeling waves throughout my body, and also feeling supreme satisfaction to have finally successfully had a prostate orgasm.
There is definitely a spaghetti leg feeling still, and a lovely afterglow.”
- Source: Reddit
What The Heck Is Prostate Milking?
Quick answer: Prostate milking is when a man inserts a finger or sex toy in his anus and slowly massages his prostate through the anal wall.
It was originally done for medical reasons because by massaging prostate you essentially flush stagnant and toxic seminal fluids from the prostate gland.
This process lessens the chances of prostate cancer. Any stagnant energy is what causes tumors to grow.
The best thing is that prostate orgasms happen separately from ejaculation letting you have as many orgasms as you want.
Prostate massage and prostate milking mean the same thing.
Only guys can do it, as women don’t have prostate.
Women pleasures anally come from erectile tissue stimulation.
The picture below shows where the prostate is located and the way you milk it is either by finger using come hither motion or a prostate massager.
With massager, you simply pick stimulating angle and contract and release PC muscles and feel the magic happen.
Before we dive into the secret arts of prostate milking, lets learn a little more about it.
How To Find Your Prostate and the P-spot?
The male prostate is very similar to female G-spot.
If you’ve found it before when satisfying a lady, you’ll know what to look for.
It is an erectile tissue that during arousal will fill with fluid creating a bump in the anal wall similar to the female G-spot.
When looking for it in the area, you’ll feel it as a change of texture.
It will feel circular, different from the rest of the tissue there. The more aroused you are, the easier it will be to find it.
If female G-spot can be felt (when aroused) two knuckles in her vagina, then male P-spot can be felt about two knuckles in the anus.
You’ll need to get through two anal sphincters to be able to reach it.
First one, you can control and relax.
The second one will take time and patience to let you in.
The picture below shows both sphincters, prostate location and the wall where the P-spot is located:
You can also stimulate prostate externally by massaging the perineum between the balls and anus, but you’ll feel far less pleasure than you would with internal massage.
But still, it could serve as a gentle intro.
Here are the quick steps you can take to find your P-spot:
- lube your anus and finger generously
- relax your butt as you massage the entrance of your rectum. The external anal sphincter is the muscle you can control voluntary, so relax and let your finger in.
- as you get around one knuckle in (around 2cm) you’ll reach the internal second anal sphincter. This one you can't control, just patiently wait with your finger lightly pressing against the entrance. After a while sphincter will relax and let you in a little deeper.
- Once you get past both sphincters you’ll notice things open up a little and you’re ready to explore.
- Your prostate is located about 3 inches (7-8 cm) deep. Finger facing towards your front, search around till you notice different kind of tissue and a little circular bump. The first time you find it you’ll probably jump up with the surprise of intense sensations.
Congratz, you just found the P-spot!
How To Milk Your Prostate & Achieve A Prostate Orgasm (Step by Step)
With introductions out of the way, let’s get to the juicy stuff.
The following steps will cover how to give yourself a prostate orgasm without a partner.
It will be much easier for you to relax and explore when you are by yourself at start.
Once you’re comfortable, let your partner in! Chances are, she will be excited for a chance to dominate you and see you squirm from pleasure. At the end of this guide, I give some advice on partner play.
The steps following will cover the fingering technique.
Thats the best way to get started! When you’re a beginner you don’t know yet what kind, size and shape of prostate massager you would like.
The finger is the most versatile introduction. After that, you’ll be able to better understand what things to look for in the toy.
Truth is, every man is different.
What works for one, doesn’t work for someone else.
I’ve tried to make this guide as inclusive as possible giving the various techniques that most men, me including, report to be working the best.
Remember to be patient.
Don’t be discouraged if you don’t achieve prostate orgasm the first time.
You’re learning a new skill and by rushing too fast to the goal, you’re shooting yourself in the leg.
Focus on enjoying the journey, let destination (prostate orgasm) be a pleasant surprise 🙂
Step #1 - Hygiene & Tools: How To Prepare For Anal Sex
My own biggest fear when I started with the anal play was safety and hygiene.
Usually, things come out from your rectum, not go in, right?
Isn’t It Messy?
The more you do it, the more you get used to all sorts of liquids, sounds and accidents happening during sex.
I usually just take a shower and make it the first part of the ritual.
Taking a hot, long shower while touching the body, slowly stroking your penis and massaging the entrance of the anus, does it.
Make cleaning your anal entrance part of the foreplay.
Don’t forget massaging perineum area (between anus and balls) and balls.
If you are very sensitive towards any mess here’s what you can do:
Do a deep cleaning with enema bulb. It’s simple.
Get a bulb with a nozzle, that you can fill with warm, clean (drinking) water.
Lube the nozzle, and splash the water inside your anus. Leave it there for a while to let the water loose up any solid matter that could be in your rectum. Push the water out.
Repeat for 3x - and your butt will be as clean as you can get!
- Wear latex, vinyl or nitrile gloves to keep your hands clean (or put a condom on your finger)
- Keep baby vibes or paper towels nearby just in case you need them
Safety Precautions: Are there any health risks?
In past I thought that anal play could cause trouble later in life to not be able to control bowel movements, but as I learned later - its really an urban legend.
The most common trouble from anal penetration is tiny cuts in the rectal walls, which are the result of sharp fingernails and impatience.
But even then, these bruises can only cause soreness the next day and will heal by themselves.
Here are the safety precautions you can take:
- Use natural hygiene soap bar to wash your hands and anal entrance thoroughly.
- Cut fingernails and ensure there are no sharp edges. Or just wear a condom or glove.
- Don’t use any unsafe objects, if you use sex toys - follow the instructions and regularly sterilize them
- But most Importantly: Be patient and take things SLOW.
Doesn’t it hurt?: How To Make Entering Butt Pleasurable
Remember this mantra: “If it hurts, you’re doing something wrong.”
While you will feel some discomfort at first, it shouldn’t feel painful.
Here’s the key though: You must use lube for anal.
If you managed to use saliva all this time, this is one time when it’s not gonna cut it.
You’ll need a lot of lubrication to make the entering the rectum as smooth as possible.
Which is the best lube for anal play?
Here’s the quick answer:
If you don’t want to overthink, check if lube is compatible with the sex toy, condom, glove…
Use the option that you can NEVER go wrong with:
#1 Water Based Lube
Here are two options:
- take Shibari 8 ounce lubricant for 10$…
- or buy even better budget option — Passion Lubes — 34 ounces — 20$
Water-based lubes are natural and safe, the only downside is that they dry up quickly.
That’s why buying a big container is smart
They are widely accessible, you can buy them in any pharmacy or general store.
#2 Silicone Based Lube
Silicone-based lubes last long and are super slippery!
Uberlube is a great option.
If you’re using a latex condom or simply a finger, this is an incredible and safe option!
The only downside to silicone lubes is that they cannot be used with silicone sex toys.
#3 Can I Use Coconut Oil For Anal Play?
Use coconut oil only for jacking off your penis.
I know everyone is raving about coconut oil, but truth is, there are no researches on how it affects vaginal PH levels or butt play. And I've looked.
Step #2 - Relax and Prepare The Space As A Meditative Ritual
If you want to increase your chances of success to achieving an intense whole-body prostate orgasm earlier, you MUST really settle into this self-pleasuring ritual:
- Make sure you have at least one hour of uninterrupted time.
No phone. No commitments. No pressure on someone coming in.
- Don’t use any external stimulation, no porn.
You’ll get a lot better and more intense results if you focus on your own sensations. Trust me on this.
- Meditate, relax your body and mind
I call it a meditative ritual because a good self-pleasuring session is full of presence, breathing, and relaxation. The same as meditation. Use shower as the foreplay for getting yourself into the mood.
Take your time to prepare the space:
- get the room temperature just right,
- put on a piece of relaxing background music (spa music is my favorite)
- prepare a glass of water, lube, paper towels nearby
Quick Relaxation Exercises:
- Deep breathing
This is my favorite step to relax and calm the mind. Take a deep, slow breath in through the nose in your belly and exhale through your mouth. (you can also download Headspace app for 10 min guided relaxation)
For best results: count to 5 as you inhale, hold the breath for 5 counts and exhale for 5 points. Do this for 20-30 times.
- Jump up and down shaking out the whole body
Do this for a minute, shake your legs, arms. As you exhale make loud noises, make them funny - little laugh will help. This will shake the tension out of your body.
- Journal to get rid of the thoughts
If you have a lot of trouble stopping the thoughts try journaling. Just put all your thoughts out there on the paper. You’ll find your mind naturally calms down as you do it.
Don’t overlook the importance of this step!
The more relaxed your body and mind the more intense the whole-body experience will be!
My guess that for the many men who try prostate massage and fail is because they didn’t take the time, they used external stimulation and didn’t focus on being present…enjoying the journey.
They were goal oriented - working intentionally towards elusive prostate orgasm, without even noticing the beautiful sensations in their body along the way!
Step #3 - Taking It Slow: Getting Your Body In The Aroused State
Now that you are relaxed with space prepared, it’s time to lay down and start the play.
While I really recommend not to touch your penis during the prostate milking to avoid genital experience, it’s nice to do in the start.
Here are the steps to get yourself in aroused, elevate state:
Don’t rush the erection
Start by touching your body - nipples, belly, inner thighs.
Lube the whole genital area generously.
Massage your balls, perineum area, slowly stroke your penis till you feel the hot sexual energy rising.
Take your time, breathe in deeply through your nose in your belly, exhale deeply through your mouth with a noise.
Take the position
It’s important to reach your hand from behind not from the front between your legs.
Your hand will feel much more comfortable that way, and you want as much comfort as possible.
My favorite position is laying on the side as the lady in the picture and putting my hand in from behind.
This position allows you to fully relax, comfortably breathe and easily change the angle of your butt when looking for the most pleasant P-spot position.
External Scrotum massage
Once you’re feeling the hot energy rising, stop penis stimulation.
Trust me, you are looking to discover prostate orgasm, not the good old penile ejaculation.
There are two sphincters you need to get past. The external sphincter you can control.
Massage the anal entrance and slowly push in your index finger. Breathe and relax.
If you’re calm, you’ll get past the first sphincter quickly.
You can contract your butt muscles as you breathe in and relax as your exhale to help yourself to let go.
Step #4 - Getting Inside: Reaching The P-Spot
Okay, you’re one knuckle in.
Now you should take it slow.
The internal, second sphincter is the one you cannot control, so you just need to be patient, hang out in there, breathe and wait until it lets you in.
Anal walls have the most nerve endings after the genitals, there is a lot going on if you pay attention.
While waiting observe your body:
- Do you feel the body pressing down on the bed? Can you feel your toes?
- What happens to your penis as you massage the anal walls?
- What sensations you feel when moving your finger circularly?
- Oh..and did I say - breathe? Enjoy how your body relaxes as you exhale, contracts as you inhale.
- Feel the air entering your nostrils filling your belly.
After a few minutes of waiting you should feel the internal sphincter slowly giving in and opening up.
As you proceed you’ll feel there is a lot more open space there.
Finding the P-Spot
P-spot shows up when you’re aroused. Look around.
Bend your finger a bit and touch the anal walls. Observe how the stimulation affects your body.
If you need to increase arousal, touch your body and genital area for a short time.
Then stop and focus just on the internal anal massage.
P-Spot is located towards the front of your body.
As you explore there you will notice a sudden change of texture and bump on the wall.
If you’ve found G-spot in past, P-spot feels about the same.
This video should help with directions.
You’ll know it when you find it.
You’ll jump up from the sudden sensation.
Step #5 - Techniques For Massaging P-spot and Stages of Arousal
Okay, it probably took your 5-10 minutes to get till the P-spot.
Now it gets a bit tricky.
Everyone is different and you should experiment a lot till you find the right angle, pressure, and pace.
Here are a few ideas:
- press your finger on top of the P-spot and pull it down in come hither motion
- try a firm and direct pressure like pressing the doorbell button and releasing
- move your finger left to right like windshield vipers
- experiment by adding the second finger in there.
- angle your butt differently to change the way P-spot is exposed
Notice your arousal slowly increase. Notice sensations in your body.
Stay relaxed and continue breathing heavily.
Take your time. Even if you don’t notice mind-blowing orgasm approaching, don’t worry.
Remember: It’s about the journey!
If you’ll forget yourself in the journey, chances are the destination will arrive unexpectedly at the right time.
How do you know if you’re moving in the right direction?:
- Your penis will get hard without any stimulation. Transparent drops of pre-cum might come out.
- You’ll start noticing sudden PC muscle contractions.
- You’ll feel hot waves of energy building up around your genital area
- You’ll feel your legs and cheeks tingling, you’ll feel a little high.
You’ll notice sensations only increasing in strength and intensity if you’re moving the right direction.
You might even feel like peeing at some moment, which could mean you’re pressing too strong on P-spot.
But not to worry, it means - it’s all working!
If you keep all this time with deep, slow breathing while slowly increasing your arousal with constant, slow P-spot massage, you’ll experience sensations through the whole body!
If you don’t keep the pace and breath - you’ll feel the sensations ONLY surrounding your rectum, perineum and genital area.
Whatever happens… Roll with those feelings and keep going. If you’ve seen women orgasming intensely, whole body shaking - that’s where you’re going. Embrace it.
Don’t be afraid to moan and let your body shake - enjoy the intensity!
Step #6 - The Final Stage: Achieving Prostate Orgasm
As the intensity increases, you’ll feel like something is coming. That energy simply must go somewhere.
As the orgasm approaches your ab muscles will start shaking, PC muscles will intensively flex and relax by themselves.
You’ll feel waves of energy going through the body. It will feel like an implosion happening inside that will not subside for 30-60 seconds.
But since it’s a dry orgasm, you can keep going for one more…and one more orgasm. Every next orgasm will come faster and will last longer.
If you’ve ever been jealous of multi-orgasmic woman, now you’re there too!
When you’re done, just lay with that pleasure, keep breathing and feel the waves calming down.
You’ll feel like after energizing workout or sauna. It’s incredible.
Troubleshooting tips: It Didn’t Work?
You followed all the steps but didn't achieve a prostate orgasm?
Here’s what you can adjust:
- Did you keep the SLOW and DEEP BREATHING throughout the whole session? Did you rush the P-spot massage? This is the biggest culprit to failure. Try again slower next time and say to yourself - “I’ll focus on being present and enjoy the journey, even if I don’t reach orgasm.”
- Some guys will require penis stimulation while doing prostate milking. It’s okay, try it, just focus on slow penis strokes. Your goal is to get the main release from prostate, not from your genitals.
- Finger just doesn’t work. Sometimes you’re not able to reach prostate, press it enough etc. Then you should explore prostate toys which can give harder pressure, deeper stimulation or even vibrating sensation.
Taking It Up The Notch: What Are The Best Prostate Massagers?
The finger is great to start things out, but as your experience and knowledge in prostate milking grow, you do want to add prostate toys to the arsenal.
The sex toy companies are getting better and better with creating the ultimate pleasure toys, it should be foolish to ignore them.
- Maybe your finger got tired and you want something more “hands-free?"
- Maybe you want easier access and extended reach?
- Maybe you tried prostate massage several times, didn’t get results, but still want to give it another go?
- Maybe you want more novelty and experience new textures and sensations?
Prostate massagers are the natural next step towards a hands-free relaxing experience.
The only challenge with prostate massagers is to find the right one for you.
That’s why it’s so important to pay attention to your finger stimulation and ask yourself questions like:
- what kind of sensations I enjoy the most?
- how deep is my prostate? how big is it?
- how strong pressure I need?
When you know these answers it’s much easier to look for the right fit.
My top long term recommendation.
Aneros is the first company who started creating prostate massagers originally for medical purposes until graduating to becoming a sex toy creators.
Aneros Progasm comes the highest recommended by most guys, as the other model Helix Syn is too small.
Don’t be intimidated by the size. This one you’ll use forever.
Yes, maybe smaller model would be better for the first 1-2 tries, but you’ll quickly wish for a bigger one.
This is the one I got and use myself. It hits the P-spot perfectly and you can easily increase the pressure by stronger contractions. Just remember to take it real slow.
What’s great about prostate massagers is that they are hands-free and you experience sensations simply by contracting and relaxing PC muscles.
No more uncomfortable and tiring finger movements.
If you’re looking for a cheap, exciting and vibrating option, then PaloQueth is the best starting option for you.
The price is hard to beat and while in future you might wanna invest in higher quality option, it’s a great start to understand if vibrations are for you.
You’ll get 10 different massage modes and remote control.
Remote control really helps with the ease of use and no interruptions in pleasure.
When starting out, don’t use the vibration, first focus on finding the P-spot and your own sensations.
Add the vibrations after you know what you’re doing. Just a little tip.
Okay, and this is the final ultimate pleasure prostate toy.
Lelo company create one of the best and highest quality male sex toys.
They are incredible.
Lelo Hugo pros:
- It’s a hands-free, has a wireless remote
- has huge amount of options for different vibrations,
- a long lasting battery
- …and overall is beautifully made object.
The only downside? They are expensive.
But if you make a prostate play a regular part of your self-pleasuring process, then you might wanna invest in one high-end toy.
I’ll let you ponder 🙂
How To Use Prostate Massager?
Don’t worry - every prostate sex toy comes with a user manual.
But in nutshell, the process of entering the toy in rectum is similar to the finger.
The only difference is that these toys are initially bigger than your finger so you’ll need to take a little more time to relax and wait at the entrance waiting for internal sphincter to relax.
After you’re in you’ll just position the toy, let it go and start contracting your PC muscles (the same ones you use to stop urinating).
That’s it. You might want to adjust the toy or your own butt angle for better pleasures, but that’s about it.
You get it in and then it’s just about enjoying the sensations, breathing and contracting the PC muscles 🙂
How To Introduce Prostate Play To Your Partner
Before we finish, I just wanted to hint how easy it is to introduce prostate play with your partner.
From all the women I’ve talked to, including my girl - they are all excited about the idea of either seeing me doing prostate stimulation, doing it to me or try the pegging play with a strap-on.
If you as a guy are okay with it, your woman will be down for it for sure!
The easiest first step to introduce anal play is to offer her to watch you please yourself. Just let her be there and observe you.
It will serve as nice foreplay…
Then as you progress you can let her do it while guiding her…
And finally, if you’re both into a power play (BDSM, anyone?), nothing is as submissive for the guy and dominating for a woman as pegging the guy in the butt. Pick yourselves a strap-on and add some novelty.
Little experimentation never hurt no one!
I really hope this guide was helpful for you and you’ll reach your first prostate orgasm!
There are so many fuzzy guides out there that feel like the authors have never experienced prostate orgasm themselves!
Please share your success or challenge stories below to inspire other guys!