BDSM Contract Template For Dom and Sub [Free PDF Template]

If you’ve been experimenting with some BDSM play with your partner, you know that drafting an official BDSM contract might be a good idea.

It is especially important if your kinky playtime is way more than just occasional tying and spanking as it helps to set a common ground and release yourself into your roles fully.  

So, let’s look at what exactly a BDSM contract is, why you might want to create one, and also, I’ll be sharing a template you can use. 

Let’s jump right in!


What Is A BDSM Contract and Why Do You Need One?

So, the BDSM contract is a contract that you create with your partner with all of your sub/dom play rules, punishments, and any other details. 

It’s part of the whole appeal of the BDSM and can be a great update on your bondage play, having the contract to remind you of your agreement. 

Now, you must know that it’s not a legally binding document, even if you sign it!

So, you can’t really take your partner to court if they didn’t obey you and didn’t suck your dick on a Friday night like it was outlined…

It also has to be consensual and signed by both parties agreeing to everything that is outlined inside. 

If you’re not sure why you might need to have one, here are a few good reasons to convince you:

#1: This contract will establish clear rules, boundaries, and limits of your BDSM set-up, leaving you both safe to dive into your roles. 

#2: It will ensure that both you and your partner are on the same page about what you want from the dynamic/playtime/relationship.

#3: It will guide your relationship and allow you to strengthen your intimate bond. 


Important Parts Of Your BDSM Contract

As with all the other contracts, there are a few key parts you need to know before crafting your own BDSM contract template. 

First of all, you should know that there are a few different types of BDSM contracts:

  • Light BDSM Contract: even if you’re participating only in vanilla bondage, you’ll have some sort of instructions and safe words to make sure that everyone is comfortable during play.
  • Dominant/Submissive Contract: this is the contract type I’ll be focusing on today, and it’s the most popular one, which outlines all the things about your arrangement during the scene. 
  • BDSM Lifestyle Contract: some people like to take it up a notch and take BDSM outside their bedroom and into their daily life. In this case, the contract is a MUST to define the lifestyle dynamics that everyone is happy about.  

And now, here are the essential parts of every BDSM should have:

  • Definitions: you want to make sure you have the language you’ll be using noted, as well as names you’ll be using. 
  • Safe Words: always discuss the safe words before getting into BDSM play.
  • Boundaries: another important thing to discuss and let your partner know. Here go all the things you’re comfortable with and things that should not be performed during the scene.
  • Punishments And Rewards: every submissive will need a bit of punishment from time to time, so come up with reasonable fines. Also, it might be a good idea to include some reward ideas for good behavior. 
  • Dom/Sub Responsibilities: work out what things you each have to/want to do and note them down as well. 

And now, let’s get to the actual BDSM contract template:


BDSM Contract Template

DEFINITIONS

Submissive – the person that is giving away their power and is absolutely giving into Dominant’s will during the BDSM scene.

Dominant – the person that has all the power over the Submissive and is responsible for all the arrangements during the BDSM scene. 

Boundaries – a set of soft and hard limits for the punishments, bondage, and humiliation that are not allowed during the acene. 

Punishments and Rewards – a set of actions that are taken in case of Submissive’s bad or good behavior. The Dominant can only use the punishments they agreed on upon signing the contract and can decide when the Submissive deserves to be punished and if they deserve to be rewarded. 

Safe Word – the world both parties agree on to be used if any party is feeling uncomfortable, wants to slow down, or is approaching their limits. 


TERMS

This agreement outlines the consensual relationship between the two individuals. 

The contract’s purpose is protecting the dominant and submissive parties while they both explore the activities they agreed on. 

This agreement is valid only in the bedroom, during the BDSM play scene and does not extend upon the matters of parenting, financial matters, or major life decisions. 

The initial contract duration is starting from [date] and is valid until that date or until the contract is terminated by any of the parties. 

The contract can also be terminated at any point by either the Dominant or the Submissive if there are any health or safety issues.


SAFE WORDS

Both the Submissive and Dominant parties have equal rights to use any of the safe words agreed upon below at any time during the play. 

The “Safe word #1” indicates that the party feels good with the course of the play and should always answer if the other party is asking. 

The “Safe word #2” indicates the party’s will to slow the activities down.

The “Safe word #3” is used to show the need to stop any of the activities.

Once any of the agreed safe words are used, the second party must respect the intention behind it and adjust the activities accordingly.

Safe Words Both Parties Agree On:

Safe word #1:__________________________________

Safe word #2:__________________________________

Safe word #3:__________________________________


BOUNDARIES

The Dominant and the Submissive will have a set of limitations of activities, punishments, and actions that each party can endure. 

These boundaries will be agreed upon before signing the contract, and both parties have to honor them during the duration of the contract. 

Submissive’s boundaries:

Soft Limits:

  • Bruises: no marks and bruises can be left on the face or other visible areas. The rest of the body that can be covered with clothing, is alright. 
  • There should be no blood drawn during the activities.
  • […]
  • __________________________________

Hard Limits:

  • Fisting.
  • Fire Play.
  • […]
  • __________________________________

Dominant’s boundaries:

Soft Limits:

  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________

Hard Limits:

  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________

Each party agrees to obey the limits and to not cross the Hard Limits under no circumstances.

If any party disrespects and pushes the Hard Limits agreed upon above, the scene must be over immediately and the other party has the right to end the relationship and terminate the contract immediately. 


DOMINANT’S ROLE 

  1. The Dominant agrees to care for the Submissive’s wellbeing, including safety and mental and emotional wellbeing.
  2. The Dominant agrees to choose whatever activity they find appropriate from the Activity List for the scene. 
  3. The Dominant accepts the responsibility to use their power to mold and shape the submissive. 
  4. The Dominant accepts the responsibility of treating the Submissive properly, carrying out the punishments and rewards accordingly, and doing the things with the Submissive that seems fit. 
  5. The Dominant agrees to always regard the Submissive’s boundaries and follow the agreements of this contract.
  6. The Dominant will be faithful to the Submissive and won’t have any other Submissives unless otherwise agreed. 
  7. The Dominant agrees to create a set of rules for the Submissive to obey and will ensure that the Submissive follows them. 
  8. The Dominant agrees to revise the contract at the Submissive’s ask and revise and update the rules and boundaries.
  9. The Dominant has the right to control the Submissive’s pleasure and allow them to climax when it sees fit to them. 

SUBMISSIVE’S ROLE

  1. The Submissive agrees to submit to their Dominant completely within the scene or sexual play-time. 
  2. The Submissive also agrees that upon signing the contract, during the scene, their body belongs to the Dominant, and they can do whatever they see fit with it as per this contract’s terms.
  3. The Submissive has a right to use Safe Word to pause and stop the activity if they feel uncomfortable at any time.
  4. The Submissive should always follow and obey the Dominant’s rules and expect to be punished if they disobey them as the Dominant sees fit. 
  5. The Submissive agrees to be faithful, loyal, and honest with their Dominant at all times. 
  6. The Submissive will respond to any Dominant’s sexual needs as they see it fit, as long as the chosen activities were agreed upon in this contract.
  7. The Submissive agrees to always regard the Dominant’s boundaries and follow the agreements of this contract.
  8. The Submissive agrees to always act in a manner that is respectful to the Dominant during the BDSM scene.
  9. The Submissive agrees to revise the contract at the Dominant’s ask and revise and update the rules and boundaries.

ACTIVITY LIST FOR THE SCENE

Before signing the agreement, both the Dominant and Submissive have to discuss the activities that are safe to perform during the scene. 

List Of Activities:

  • Restraining
  • Spanking
  • Choking
  • [….]
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________

PUNISHMENTS

The Dominant and the Submissive agree that appropriate punishments are needed for the growth of the submissive. 

The Submissive will be told when they have been bad, and before they will receive the punishment. 

The punishments will be delivered promptly, and they will fit the Submissive’s disobedience. 

Punishments are not negotiable and are in the sole power of the Dominant, but the submissive always has the right to use Safe Words to stop or pause the punishments if there are any concerns. 

The list of possible punishments is agreed upon by both parties upon the signing of the contract. 

The list of punishments that both parties agreed on is: 

  • [list your punishments here]
  • […]
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________

REWARDS

On the rare occasions that the Dominant feels like the Submissive needs to be rewarded for their good behavior, they can grant them mercy. 

The rewards will be rare, and the Submissive should not expect the Dominant to grant them gifts for every good behavior. 

The Dominant has the right to decide on when the reward will be given to the Submissive or which reward is appropriate. 

The Submissive doesn’t have the right to ask the Dominant for the reward and can be punished for asking. 

Both parties agree on the rewards before signing the contract.

The list of rewards both parties agreed on:

  • [list your reward] for [list your good behavior]
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________
  • __________________________________

SIGNATURES

The contract between two consensually agreeing parties is active immediately after signing it.

Submissive’s Signature ____________________________Date__________________

Dominant’s Signature _____________________________ Date __________________


Conclusion

So, if you’ve wanted to take your BDSM play with your partner to another level, now you know exactly how to do it!

But seriously, having the contract you both agree on to make your BDSM play more official is great. It’s crucial for BDSM as it can really quickly turn into something traumatizing if both parties are not on the same page. 

Feel free to modify this contract to fit your envisioned kind of play.

Have fun, be open with your partner, and it’ll be the best experience in your life!

If you want to know more about your kink, you can try our BDSM Test Kink here.

Dainis Graveris

Dainis Graveris

Over last 4 years Dainis have helped millions of people through his advice on this site (200+ guides and 1M+ visits/monthly). His work & advice has appeared on sites like: Healthline, Vice, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health, WomensHealthMag, MindBodyGreen & more. Read More.

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