20 Most Extreme Sex Toys For Some Hardcore BDSM Plays (2023)

Whether you’re a curious kinkster or looking for new extreme sex toys, brace yourself because this guide is as hardcore as it gets!

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At-A-Glance: Our Top Recommended Extreme Sex Toys

The best BDSM toys ain’t for pussies!

So you need a bit of conviction to go through this list. I’m telling you right now that these toys can be somewhat extreme for the faint of heart. But BDSM isn’t something you can just dive in head-first, either. 

There are dominant submissive relationships you have to form with these fetishes. And it is somewhat true for these toys as well. There has to be a connection beforehand to know what you’re doing.

So if you want to know more, we’ll give you the deets on the most extreme sex toys you can use for your hardcore nights. 

Hismith Fucking Machine

Hismith Fucking Machine

  • This Is One Of The Most Relentless Sex Machine
  • 240 Strokes Per Minute
  • With An Optional App Control
Mr. Hankey’s Gut Puncher

Mr. Hankey’s Gut Puncher

  • For Fisting Lovers
  • Lifecasted From A Real Hand & Forearm
  • Will Give You The Most Incredible & Realistic Experience
Cock Locker Inflatable Monster Realistic Dildo

Cock Locker Inflatable Monster Realistic Dildo

  • A Bouncy Realistic Monster Dildo
  • A Flexible and Inflatable Monster Dildo
  • Can Get Even Bigger With The Hand Pump!

The Best Sex Toys For Extreme & Hardcore BDSM Sex

Mr. Hankey’s Gut Puncher





Insertable Length

Hismith Fucking Machine


Silicone (Dildo)


1”-6” (stroke length)

Insertable Length

Cock Locker Inflatable Monster Realistic Dildo





Insertable Length

Bondage Boutique Squeeze And Tease Nipple Clamps




Mr Hankey's Huge Dildos

$ – $$$

Platinum Silicone

Depends On The Chosen Size And Product

Depends On The Chosen Size And Product

Insertable Length
Depends On The Chosen Size And Product

Fetish Fantasy Extreme Sex Stool


Metal frame, TPU straps

17” x 24”

Weight Capacity
 300 lbs.

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1. Hismith Fucking Machine

Whether you’re looking for some mindblowing solo sex or you want to restrain your partner and watch them get truly fucked, the Hismith machine will do the trick.

At $400 it is pretty steep. BUT, this is more than a sex toy…this is a sturdy piece of sexual machinery! 

The Hismith Premium sex machine comes with a body-safe silicone dildo, giving you 6” insertable length at 240 strokes per minute. Basically, like being banged by Superman! 

Interested in learning more? Read our in-depth review here.

Use HSM10 code to get 10% off + free spring attachment from purchase.

Check out other great sex toys in our best sex machine guide.

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2. Mr. Hankey’s Gut Puncher

The name speaks for itself. Mr. Hankey’s Gut Puncher sex toy feels like you’re getting punched in the gut – in a good way!

Let me explain why.

The Gut Puncher sex toy is pretty bendable, especially at the wrist. (Tip: Don’t get a very soft firmness. Even the Medium-Firm flexibility still bends a bit.)

That could make the initial inserting pretty challenging. But this flexibility also causes this toy to ‘POP’ in (that punch) when it enters your hole. Once it’s in, oh boy, does it feel A-MA-ZING.

It’s molded from a real hand and forearm, so it feels as realistic as it gets. Plus, it’s 100% body-safe.

Check out other great sex toys in our best fisting dildo guide.

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3. Cock Locker Inflatable Monster Realistic Dildo

Bouncy, meaty, veiny, super flexible, AND inflatable!

The Cock Locker monster dildo starts off with an already impressive 9” circumference and an insertable length of 10.75”.

Which would be enough to make anyone’s eyes water. But this thing just keeps getting bigger! 

Using the hand pump, you can get this extreme sex toy up to a whopping 12” circumference and 11.25” insertable length.

Lube up, insert, and then pump it up to feel it slowly stretch you. It does also have a quick-release valve just in case it gets too intense. Phew!

Note: If you want extreme anal stretching, you could try getting this inflatable butt plug from the Oxy-Shop. This inflatable butt plug starts at around 5″ in circumference for easy insertion, even for beginners, and inflates up to 12.6″ in preparation for extreme anal sex or much bigger sex toys.

Check out other great sex toys in our best inflatable dildo guide.

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4. Mr. Hankey’s Huge Dildos

Let’s kick off with something substantial in the size department, shall we?

Vaginally or anally, massive dildos can be a fun way to test your limits. And Mr. Hankey’s huge dongs will do just that. 

With dildos giving extreme girth AND extreme length, they have something to satisfy even the most greedy of size queens. 

Take your pick of realistic massive dildos or opt for something truly out of this world from their selection of fantasy and Sci-Fi monster cocks.

Like the XXXL Seahorse dildo with an insertable length of 15.25″. Not for the faint-hearted!

Note: If you’re gonna use one for anal stimulation (think kinda like a butt plug), make sure to use lots of water-based lube as the anus doesn’t self lubricate.

Want to check out more big huge dildos? Head over to our best large dildos guide.

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5. Bondage Boutique Squeeze and Tease Nipple Clamps

Take nipple tweaking to the next level with a set of industrial-style clover nipple clamps by Bondage Boutique.

These heavy metal pinchers not only squeeze but the stimulating bumps on the pinchers ramp up the intensity.

What makes these more extreme than other nipple clamps is the non-adjustable design which means more restriction and inevitable ‘tugging’.

You can also add extra weight to the chain to pull on those nips even more!

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6. Fetish Fantasy Extreme Sex Stool

At first glance, the Fetish Fantasy sex toy might not look much. But lemme tell you, it offers a whole heap of fun!

The raiser bar under the ‘seat’ lets you attach your favorite dong via harness or suction cup. So it’s great for solo play. 

The bar can also be removed to allow your partner to fit underneath.

Position yourself over their cock and achieve deeper penetration than ever before by bouncing up and down on the stretchy straps. OR, focus on their face and relax into a rim job or some pussy worship. 

Check out other great sex toys in our best sex chair guide.

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extreme sex toy for cbt

7. Dragon Magnetic Ball Stretcher

Now, onto some Cock and Ball Torture (CBT). If you crossed your legs when you read that, bear with me! CBT sounds intensely painful, but it can be intensely pleasurable. 

If you enjoy some grabbing and tugging on your balls, then a ball stretcher might be the extreme sex toy for you. 

Ball stretchers do exactly what they say, pull down on your boys. Some guys do it for the stretching sensation alone. Others like that it makes their balls more sensitive.

And then there are those who just prefer the look and feel of low-hangers.

The stainless steel Dragon Magnetic Ball Stretcher will certainly make your balls drop, with more than 1 lbs hanging off your plums!

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extreme spreader bar

8. Sportsheets Expandable Spreader Bar and Cuffs

If you want to restrain your sub in a way that gives you easy access to their love holes, then a spreader bar is a must.

The Sportsheets sex toy comes with Velcro fastening cuffs which may be too tame for the kinkster into hardcore sex.

But you can easily switch them out for something leather and lockable.

The bar has an O-ring in the middle giving you the option to attach more restraints…like wrist cuffs, leash & collar, or waist restraint. 

Check out other great options on our best spreader bar guide.

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9. Rosebud Urethral Sound Kit

If you’re looking for the most extreme sex toy for men, then the Rosebud Urethral Sounding Kit might be the one.

Urethral sounds are basically probes that come in different lengths and widths and are inserted into the urethra. 

WHY the hell would anyone want to do that? You might be asking…

Well, this hardcore BDSM sex toy is meant to stimulate the sensitive nerve endings in the urethra. AND if you’re brave enough and can go long enough, you can even reach the prostate. If you want to learn more about this topic, check out this guide.

With this particular kit, you have 7 double-sided probes, giving you a total of 16 sizes to stretch and tickle your penis from within.

Note: We’re replaced this with an alternative recommendation in the meantime.

extreme sex toy


10. SquarePeg Slink

The SquarePeg Slink Depth Training Dildo is a popular extreme sex toy for men and women in anal depth training.

Anal depth training is all about learning to relax the puborectalis sling… The what?

A quick biology lesson…the puborectalis sling is a U-shaped muscle that clamps down when it feels pressure. 

Learn to relax that, and you can continue along the anal passage, opening you up to new realms of pleasure. 

The XXL version of this super slinky silicone dildo will have you inserting a whopping 23.5” into your ass. Lubed up, it’s like a slippery tentacle opening up your second sphincter. 

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most Extreme e-stim kit

11. E-Stim Device

Electrosex sounds pretty shocking…but it’s a great way to power up your orgasms.

Using low-voltage, high-frequency electricity, you can give yourself or your partner some internal and external zaps, snaps, tingles n’ tickles with these extreme sex toys.

This e stim kit from ElectraStim comes with a 3” ‘Aura’ probe for pussy or anal stimulation and a cock loop to buzz your boner. 

But I think the best item in the kit is the adhesive pads. Who would have thought you could have contactless spanking? No bruises, just the same delicious sting on your buttcheeks!

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Extreme toy for prickling and tickling

12. Fifty Shades Darker Wartenberg Pinwheel

Another popular hardcore BDSM toy is the Wartenberg Pinwheel. This little pleasure tool is extreme mainly for its appearance… it looks like a medieval torture device! 

But really, this 22-spiked wheel is all about pleasure. With just a slight hint of pain.

Use it to tease your partner during foreplay… Blindfold them and run the pinwheel over their skin. Try it in different areas, the thighs, the nipples, the back of the neck…

The prickling and tickling will enhance sensitivity and bring them to the verge. They will be begging for you to fuck them in no time! 

most EXTREME face gag

13. Humiliator Face Gag

Forget toys like ball gags or bit gags. Get your sub drooling with an open-mouth gag. Or go for something like the Humiliator Head Harness.

You can attach a massive 8” dildo to your sub’s face and ride them like the worthless little sex toy that they are.

You also have other attachment options to make their humiliation complete, such as a toilet roll holder, toilet brush, feather duster, or silver serving tray.

OR into piss play? Then check out the Oxy-shop Urinal Piss Gag. Strap that to your sub and they won’t waste a drop.

best vaginal / anal spreader for sex

14. Bondage Boutique Vaginal / Anal Spreader

For most women, vaginal spreaders will remind them of an unpleasant medical examination. But don’t let this put you off these kinds of adult sex toys.

Vaginal spreaders, also called speculums or retractors, can give your partner easy access to your G-spot and cervix. So, there IS pleasure to be had!

Let your dom/domme slip the bill inside your pussy and slowly turn the screw, opening you up wider and wider. Feel the stretch as they take a peek inside your pussy…

Not only do they provide a unique view, but they allow easier insertion of other toys.

It’s also a must-have item for any naughty nurse or dirty doctor enjoying medical role play!



15. Spiked Cock Cage

Another extreme sex toy for men and sticking with the cock and ball torture theme, a Spike Cock Cage will keep your sub’s prick in check. 

This is a chastity cage with a difference…

First of all, the cage attaches to an adjustable handcuff-style steel ring complete with a padlock and key. 

But the piste de resistance

The stainless steel cage consists of spiked rings plus a ball divider that will teach your naughty sub a lesson should he dare to get an erection.

It’s a great extreme toy for couples into DDLG and cuckolding or anyone into extreme power play.

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Extreme stainless steel dildo

16. Njoy Pure Wand

This might not look like an extreme sex toy… but this stainless steel dildo made the list for the sheer amount of gushing and squirting orgasms it’s said to deliver.

When it comes to satisfying, the Njoy Pure Wand is in a league of its own thanks to its unique design. 

The weighty wand is curved in such a way to bring the bulbous ends in direct contact with your G-spot or P-spot. For extra sensations, pop the dildo in the fridge or run it under warm water beforehand. 

Interested to know more details about Njoy Pure Wand? Check out our in-depth review here.

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17. Anal Stout Dilator Kit

Say you just got yourself one of those mammoth sci-fi dildos from Mr. Hankey and plan on tackling it with your butt.

Chances are, you will need to do a little anal stretching first.

Enter: the Anal Adventures Anal Dilator Kit!

Anal dilators widen your anal passage to give you a path of least resistance and maximum pleasure!

They are a popular extreme gay sex toy, as a warm-up for bottoming. But also for anyone interested in butt sex, pegging, or playing with extreme anal sex toys.

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18. Medieval Stockade Set

Got yourself a sex slave and nowhere to humiliate and punish them? How about a good old-fashioned stockade? 

Back in the good old days, a criminal’s head and hands would be thrust through the holes in a wooden frame called a pillory.

They would then be put on display for public humiliation and physical abuse…

And with the Medieval Dungeon Wood Stockade Set, you can pretty much role play and do the same! Lock in your sub in any position you like, and they will be at your mercy.

Take it to the next level and combine it with the best flogger for some pain and pleasure action.

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19. Doc Johnson Hot Wax Candles

Wax play can be seriously hot! And these BDSM candles from Doc Johnson are specifically designed to be just that little bit hotter than other massage candles. 

That extra heat means a more intense sting when the hot wax hits the skin.

Mix in wax play with sensory play. Blindfold your lover so they can’t see where to expect the next drop of pleasurable pain.

The anticipation, shock, and delicious sting will have your sub all hot and bothered! 

Bear in mind, these candles are going to leave their mark. But if played with correctly, these superficial burns will fade within 12-24 hours. Just be careful!

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the best and most extreme pussy pump

20. Doc Johnson Pussy Pump

Last but not least, the humble pussy pump. I always think these things look a bit ridiculous… like a gas mask for your pussy!

BUT they are far from being a gimmick. In fact, having the best pussy pump is a very effective and relatively cheap extreme sex toy for women.

So what do they do exactly? Well, the name is deceiving as it doesn’t pump, but sucks…in a good way! It basically creates a vacuum on your vagina, increasing the blood flow. 

The aim of the game is to achieve a super swollen and super sensitive pussy. So that even the slightest touch to your lady parts will bring you to orgasm.

Oh, and the good thing about the Doc Johnson Vibrating pussy pump is the transparent cup…so your partner can watch your pussy get all puffy and juicy!

The Best Extreme Sex Toy Shops

So now you have a nice shopping list; where do you find all these interesting and somewhat disturbing items? 

Well, if you’re tempted to go to Amazon… DON’T. Please! 

Hardcore and rough sex have a higher level of risk than ‘normal’ sexual activities.

The hardcore BDSM toys you use should be well-made and of high-quality to ensure everyone has a safe experience.

There are so many rogue Amazon sellers out there selling fake brands. You can never be sure you’re getting the real thing.

You not only risk wasting your money but your or your partner’s health and well-being. It’s not worth it.

Do yourself and your play partners a favor and go direct to the main online extreme sex shops. Here are a few of our top sites for rough sex toys

Oxy-Shop: A dungeon for all extreme sex toys, especially for FemDoms. They have a wide selection of BDSM gears, accessories, and toys for the hardcore kinksters.

Stockroom: A leading name in the bondage business with almost 30 years of experience below their belt. They have become a go-to store for the advanced BDSM player and bondage BDSM furniture seekers.

Mr. Hankey’s Toys: This site satisfies the size queens with nerdy tendencies. Fill your love holes with their range of giant, realistic penis dildos, or Sci-Fi inspired monster cocks. 

ExtremeRestraints: Online since 2000, these guys offer a huge selection of top quality, extreme bondage equipment and toys for all your naughty needs.

UberKinky: UK-based but they ship worldwide and they have a great selection of BDSM gear and extreme sex toys to choose from.

TheChainGang: So much more than a jewelry store, TheChainGang provides a beautiful range of jewelry for genital piercing and stainless steel sex toys.

Lovehoney: The largest online sex shop in the world caters to kinksters of all levels of experience, including the full-blown dungeon masters into S&M. Their chin dildo collection would be a good start.

SheVibe: SheVibe has exploded onto the sex toy scene to become one of the largest sex toy suppliers in the US with a huge catalog of carefully selected brands.

Now that you know all about extreme toy safety, head over to our best fisting lubes guide for more interesting knowledge.

Feeling Brave?

So, there you have it, fellow kinksters… a little introduction to the harder side of the BDSM spectrum! 

As you can see, there are all types of kinks and fetishes to be explored in your sex life (check out our guide on the best sex furniture) and different levels within them.

Extreme sex toys aren’t for everyone. But they are a fun way to express your deepest darkest desires and have a good time.

Aliyah Moore

Aliyah Moore

Aliyah Moore (she/her) is our resident sex expert at SexualAlpha. She’s a certified sex therapist with a Ph.D. in Gender & Sexuality Studies. Aliyah is a proud Black, bi-sexual femme passionate about empowering minority voices to embrace their sexuality and identity. She loves to write about everything sexual wellness and gives no-nonsense sex and relationship advice.

Got Questions? Ping me on Twitter.