13 Monster Dildos For Some Monstrous Fetish Play! (2024)

Monster dildos are the ultimate companion for bringing your wildest fantasies to life. But there are dozens of different options out there, and each one advertises itself as the very best option money can buy —which, in many cases, isn’t really true.

To help you choose the perfect match for your needs and desires without wasting money, I’ve listed the very best monster dildos available on the market, as well as the main points to keep in mind before buying one.

Key Considerations In Choosing A Monster Dildo

• Material: Monster cock dildos come in a variety of materials, but make sure to stick with non-porous, body-safe options that are also durable and easy to clean. The go-to for most manufacturers is high-grade silicone, which is a fantastic option —just make sure to avoid using silicone lubes with them, as it can degrade the material.
• Size and Girth: Many people want a dildo that is a monster both in appearance and size, so you’ll find that many models are above average, even in the smallest size available (the Small Hankey’s Dragon, for example, has a 6.75’’ circumference near the head). Check measurements thoroughly before purchasing, and start with a smaller option to work your way up if you’re a newbie to large toys.
• Texture and Shape: Most monster-themed dildos come in crazy textures and shapes, so you’ll need to determine how much is too much. Scales, bumps, and ridges are the norm, and some options also have a knot for those up for a challenge. And, if you plan to use it for anal, a tapered head and flared base are a must for the most comfortable and safe, accident-free experience.
• Firmness: The firmness of your toy is a factor to consider alongside its texture: the firmer you go, the more you’ll feel all those different textures and intricate designs. Opt for a soft or medium-firm model if you’re not a very experienced user or you plan to use the monster dildo for anal play.
• Extra Features: If you want to go all-in on your fantasies (and don’t mind splurging), consider customizable models. Many brands can add cum tubes, suction cups, or a Vac-U-Lock attachment to enhance your experience with versatility and realism.

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Top 3 Monster Dildos

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Best Monster Dildos in 2024

The Dragon monster dildo will breathe fire into your bedroom.

Its intricate details and sculpture deserve a spot in your collection of works of art. In use, you will feel each scale slither and rub inside you. Even Smaug would get its smugness wiped with this dildo.

In addition to Mr. Hankey’s signature colors, the Dragon monster dildo comes in a special green color, making this dildo look very REALISTIC.

You’ll feel like a Khaleesi riding this dong.

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The Alien Breeder monster dildo will give you an out-of-this-world experience with sensations like no other.

Super smooth on one side, with the craziest textures on the other. If you look closely at its head, it’ll bring you to your sci-fi dreams of The Alien vs. The Predator. And you know whose side you’re on.

The knot is very pronounced to get you to the edge of orgasm—but it might be too much for some.

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When you think of an ogre, you imagine big, thick, and scary. That’s exactly what an Ogre dildo looks like. (Nope, not the green fluffy Shrek!)

Living in the wild, it has an uncut trunk-like monster cock that will make you feel the rawness of the sexperience. Fantasize a cottage-core all-natural fucking sesh in the middle of the woods.

It’s bigger than Goliath monster dildo and one of the first dildos to have the 4XL size. Yup, it will whoop your ass.

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Enjoy green jokes and enjoy green reptiles.

Have you always been curious about the sheen, scaly texture of crocodiles? They’re long, slithering, and thick, and… you don’t have to imagine what it’s like to have one inside you with the Cockadile.

Instead of a rounded body, the Cockadile monster dildo has a flatter shape that feels oh-so unique. Plus, it has a v-shaped head that makes insertion easier to handle despite its wide body.

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If the Cretan bull sires you after being lusted by the Queen of Crete, Pasiphae (yes, I know my Greek mythology), then you must be an offspring of a well-endowed mythical creature. 

That’s the Minotaur for you, and he won’t disappoint.

The Minotaur monster dildo knows its way to deep dark holes with its thick, veiny, super-textured shaft and bulbous head. It’s so VEINY it looks ANGRY.

Its pronounced head will greet and introduce you to what awaits you as you go in deeper.

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Yeehaw! Take out your cowboy hat and ride this Centaur monster dildo like the equestrian that you are!

Every rib and vein of this dildo DEMANDS to be felt. It might not look as intimidatingly textured as others, but you will FEEL it.

It’s a looong dong. And it’s an entire journey trying to go in all the way. When you FINALLY get there, you’ll get a treat of its delicious thick and ringed base.

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Are you a STRETCH lover?

Goliath is a HUGE MONSTER COCK DILDO that is ALL about the streeeeeeeetch. This one’s for you if you’re into girth > length.

That’s not to say it’s short—because it’s NOT. In fact, the smallest size has an insertable length of 8.75”, which is waaaay above average.

Take your time and take down this giant Gittite like you’re David.

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Are you a thalassophile? Then you like diving into the depths of the sea… and meeting the Seahorse monster dildo.

The great thing about this dildo is that it has more manageable sizes that you can work your way up with.

It has a tapered head, so it’s easy to insert. Start small, then the way it tapers out and expands is amazing.

It’s SUPER textured—even though it’s not too thick in girth, it’s not sweat-free to put in all the way.

But the journey is F-U-N.

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When you dive deep, deep, deep into the sea’s unexplored depths, you’ll meet the Taintacle monster dildo. This monster cock dildo will explore your hidden areas, especially anally.

It has an S-shaped design that buries down into your hole and a sharp, probing tip that will stimulate your P-spot.

This has suckers on its texture. These aren’t just designs—you will FEEL them. But not to the point that they’re painful like other tentacles.

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Taking a look at the Solatok monster dildo is like getting punched—it’s like BAM!

Monster dildos are extreme, but the Solatok monster cock is extreme-extreme.

This is for the adventurous who want a challenge from start to finish. It won’t guide you during insertion—it’s a serious blunt entry. Then, you’ll get through its pronounced ridges.

But you’re not yet done because you will be stretched by its textured shaft and bulbous knot as the ending. It would make you tear up.

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I believe Davey’s Tendrils monster cock is inspired by Davy Jones—the supernatural ruler of the Seven Seas and condemned captain of the Flying Dutchman (from Pirates of the Caribbean).

And if you ever felt hot and horny by its tentacle beard, you’ll LOVE Davey’s Tendrils.

Its tangled and twisted tendrils will slither into your hole. The start is super tapered, making it very easy to take in, and then it goes wider at the base.

Great for anal play—take down this butt pirate of the high seas.

Plus, it’s more affordable than usual monster dildos. Its price is less than $100!

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The Sigmaloid monster cock is the opposite of the Goliath monster dildo. It’s more length than girth.

This big monster cock is for the depth explorer. It’s thin, so it can bend and turn to REALLY go in deep without stretching your hole. It slides right in with ease and comfort.

It has bumps that will hit your spots, giving you great sensations.

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“Pfft, give me the biggest monster dildo!”

Chill, size royal, here you go: the Atlas monster cock.

It’s BIGGER than Goliath and Ogre.

Atlas is the most bulbous monster dildo—its smallest size has a circumference of 9 inches at its widest. And if you go to the biggest size, which is 4XL, it has a circumference of 17.50 inches.

It’s quite a hybrid—a lifelike penis design with a GIANT MONSTER size. When you go in, it will streeeetch you in its bulbous center.

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FAQs

Where to get monster dildos?

Monster dildos are not as readily available compared to your regular dildos. 

Aside from trustworthy online sex toy shops, the best place to get monster dildos is on Mr. Hankey’s. It’s home to well-made, high-quality large monster dildos that will really satisfy your needs.

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How to clean and store monster dildos?

Wash dildos with gentle soap and water before and after each use. Sterilize it as well every now and then to make sure it’s 100% clean (but make sure it’s silicone!).

Keep your monster dildo in a storage pouch and away from extreme temperatures.

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Conclusion

Visuals are so important for kinksters who are into monster dildos. And you WILL be satisfied visually with how realistic and detailed these dildos look. And, of course, you’ll enjoy EVEN MORE how they feel—in action—inside.

These monster dildos are the whole package deal.