Okay, moving on.
In all seriousness, the Venus for Men is the gold standard of milking machines. It’s the Rolls-Royce, the Louis xiii cognac, the solid-gold Rolex.
Basically, it’s been around a long time, costs a lot of money and is worth every cent.
When I first got ahold of one about a year and a half ago, I didn’t think I would end up using it all that much but boy was I wrong. In this review, I’m going to walk you through why the Venus for Men is worth the investment, go through the features like the different receivers and settings and how they all work, and help you figure out if this is the last milking machine you will ever need (spoiler alert: probably!)
Here’s the TL;DR:
This is for you if:
- You know you like milking machines and want to upgrade
- You want an easy to clean, reliable sex toy that could last forever
- You want to use it alone or with a partner in kinky scenes
- You want to improve your sexual stamina or treat ED
- You enjoy having incredible, mind-blowing orgasms!
It might not be for you if:
- You’re not sure if you like milking machines (not for first-timers)
- You think $1000 is too much for any kind of sex toy
- You prefer vibration to suction and movement
Overall, this is an outstanding milking machine that will last you a long time. Mine hasn’t gone wrong in over a year, except for the soft rubber lining which does wear out and needs to be replaced every now and again. So if you’re thinking long term, this thing will pay for itself eventually since you’ll never need another milking machine.
If you already have and use milking machines or masturbators and you’re looking for a top of the line upgrade that will keep giving you reliable orgasms forever, then look no further.
If you’re new to the world of male masturbators then you should look here for a breakdown of the cheaper alternatives.
The Bottom Line:
If you’re looking to dabble in the world of male masturbation, then this might not be for you. BUT I think it’s the best milking machine money can buy, so if that sounds like a good time then it gets a 100% recommendation from me.
Table of Contents
What’s In The Box
Opening the sturdy and discreet cardboard box for the first time I remembered being a little intimidated by the sheer amount of stuff that came with it. With all of the hoses, cables, and attachments that came with the Venus I felt like some kind of engineer working on a machine I’d never seen before.
That feeling quickly went away once I read through the handy instruction manual, which explains everything simply and effectively so anyone can set up their Venus in a minute or two.
All of the attachments can only plug into one outlet each and it’s really very intuitive, so there’s no reason to worry if like me you can’t even change a lightbulb without watching two hours of video tutorials first.
The Venus itself is a pretty imposing black box with a textured finish, two ports for the controls and connections for the large and small hoses.
There’s also attachable controls for the air pressure and speed, the hoses, the custom receiver and all the attachments, along with a useful storage bag, cleaning brush and lube.
I’m pretty sure the Rosetta Stone, British Crown Jewels, and the entire Library of Alexandria were in there too, but I gave up digging.
In the US and Canada the Venus ships with a power cord, however, if you’re ordering one from outside of those countries you have to buy your own power cord separately. It takes a standard “kettle cord” plug which is easy and cheap to find from any electronics shop.
The whole package contains:
- Your Custom Receiver made according to your specified measurements (we’ll get to the measuring process a bit later)
- 30 inches (about 75cm) of a replacement liner
- A cleaning brush
- Air Control Box, which connects to the small air port.
- A small bottle of Abco’s ID glide lube.
- A nice storage bag, good for keeping dust off
- A remote control on a detachable 4’ (120cm) cable.
- 4’ Hose Set (large and small hose)
- 1/8” Allen Wrench
- Power Cord (USA & Canada only)
- 2 Year Limited Warranty and Instruction Manuals
The Venus 2000 measures 240x155x208mm and weighs 11lbs, or about 5kg. It’s a pretty hefty black box made of textured polymer. The attachments are made of a tough clear polymer and the lining is a natural dry rubber that shouldn’t trigger any latex allergies.
Putting it all together: the Venus uses an electric motor to alternate air pressure with variable stroke lengths and speed from 8 to 300 strokes per minute.
Design And Features
Before experiencing it for myself, I was sceptical about the importance of the custom fit. On their website, Abco (the manufacturers) make A BIG DEAL about the custom fit of the receiver and how it’s essential to achieving quality orgasms. I wasn’t so sure, having used other masturbators that didn’t have this feature and getting along with them fine.
Well, I can tell you now…
Abco is right.
The custom receiver makes A HUGE DIFFERENCE!
Entering it feels like it was made for me because it was. The soft rubber material feels wonderful and inviting, with none of the plasticky feel you often get with cheaper toys.
The custom receiver comes with the basic Venus package, while the other attachments are optional extras. Having tried them all, I would recommend getting everything, but my favourite has to be the assembly tool.
Using this bad boy you can make your own receivers with their own variations to keep things fresh and exciting. The instruction manual even has some suggestions for ways to alter the basic receiver design, which I think shows great attention to detail from the manufacturers.
The Venus box has a handle for easier portability, which looks nice but I don’t find it very useful.
After all, it’s 5kg of hardware along with a bunch of cords and accessories, so it’s not what I would call convenient to carry around.
In Use: What Does It Feel Like?
I hesitate to even call the Venus a sex toy. It’s more like a whole sex experience in a box.
I used to think that whatever technology was out there, nothing could compare to the feeling of real skin on mine, the sensation of actually having sex with a real person.
I’m not so sure.
I mean, the Venus doesn’t compare to the intimacy and human side of things, but…
The main receiver, that is the normal masturbator, is easily my favourite attachment!
Of the three main attachments, about 80% of my time with the Venus is spent with this one.
This thing is the Rolls-Royce of milking machines. It will milk you dry without mercy, every time you want it.
The receiver sucks you in and doesn’t let go without being pulled out, so you can use the Venus without an erection and even have a full orgasm without ever getting hard.
I find this to be fun as a novelty, but I definitely prefer the sensation when hard over soft.
It’s easy to slip it on and leave it there while edging for hours, or experiencing leg-shaking orgasms multiple times in a row if you’re up for that.
Take care not to let it get dry, though, or it can become a bit unpleasant! Subs and masochists would probably love that, but that isn’t really my thing so I couldn’t say whether it’s great for that particular job.
The stroke speed goes from a luxuriously soft and slow 8 rpm, which is like getting a lazy Sunday afternoon blowjob, all the way up to 300rpm, which honestly for me is overkill. I’m too sensitive for that kind of speed to be very pleasurable, but if you want power in your milking machine rest assured this box has plenty to spare.
If you have trouble getting hard or staying that way, then I could see this attachment being a reason to buy the Venus all by itself. It gives some powerful suction which does make my member noticeably bigger for long enough to have some fun with it.
When playing with a partner, the pump shines as a way for your girl to embrace her inner size queen and see if she can take your new improved size.
The feeling of the pump is that of a vacuum around your dick, which is quite nice but is nowhere near as good as the wild pleasure of the Receiver. If you want a bigger dick for a little while, then it works great, and I know some people are really into the pure vacuum sucking feeling.
Also if you have issues getting or maintaining an erection, then this attachment might see a lot of use as it will definitely get the job done. All in all the pump does exactly what it’s supposed to do and does it well, but it’s not the best thing about the Venus for me.
The Head Massager
No prizes for guessing what the head massager does…
This neat little addition is just for the head of the penis, holding and massaging it in a simulated suck-job. It’s great for finishing myself off after using the receiver, or as a hot way to get my engine revving.
It makes a fun foreplay device and I bet any Domme/sub couples would get a lot of enjoyment using this attachment for edging.
The Nipple Massagers
These come in a pair, unsurprisingly, and work similarly to the other attachments by sucking in and out in a squeeze-release motion. They’re pretty fun to use on a partner to get them worked up, but out of all the attachments I use this one the least.
It’s not that they’re bad nipple massagers at all, it’s just not my favourite thing.
If nipple play is your thing…
Then definitely get this attachment along with the others, BUT if you’re not into it then you can skip this one and save yourself a few bucks.
Is It Loud?
The Venus is quieter than I would have thought at first glance, but it’s not stealthy. If you’re trying to sneak in a quick pleasure session, better make sure no one else is around (unless they’re into that sort of thing…)
What About Cleaning It?
Masturbators of any kind can be notoriously difficult to maintain and clean, so it was a pleasant surprise to find that the Venus gave me no trouble. It’s super easy to clean, much simpler than other masturbators.
Since the receiver is detachable you can just remove it, rinse with water and clean with a brush cleaner like the one provided.
One thing to remember!
Make sure you leave it to air dry completely after washing it before using it again. The Venus isn’t waterproof and if the receiver isn’t thoroughly dry there is a chance that the system will suck the excess water into the motor and ruin it. Not the kind of sucking you want!
How Long Will It Last?
Even the more expensive male toys on the market can be tragically short-lived. All those fancy electronic gizmos look genius and often do deliver a great experience, but then they tragically stop working after just a few rounds.
Not so with the Venus. In over a year of regular use, nothing went wrong, and only the rubber liner needs to be replaced once it wears out.
What Do Other People Think?
Since Venus is a high-priced specialty item, not that many people are lucky enough to have one…
…But almost everyone who does says it’s worth every penny.
This is the best purchase a guy can make. Better orgasms than sex, sturdy construction, and great service. I’ve owned one for 20 years and use it almost daily.– discusdoc
Mine came a week ago and it was the best investment by far. I should have bought it years ago. You won’t be disappointed. It was just under $1000.– asstastic769
So by the look of things most proud owners of the Venus for Men love it.
Price And Where To Buy
This is not a cheap toy. Hell, it’s so pricey that I hesitate to even call it a toy at all!
It feels professional, somehow. Every time I switch it on it reminds me of checking into a fancy hotel with an expensive escort for a night of unforgettable debauchery.
Anyway, the Venus for Men is available here for the high yet in my opinion reasonable price of $956.
If you want a high-quality blowjob machine that delivers plenty of pleasure at just ¼ of the price, take a look at the pretty fantastic Kiiroo Keon.
It’s portable, rechargeable and “only” $249.
If the Venus for Men is the Rolls-Royce of milking machines, Keon is like a mid-range Mercedes: reliable, well-made and still gets you where you want to go (AKA Orgasm City).
It’s less powerful, more affordable, and earns a solid recommendation for me if you’re looking for the next-best alternative.
If a cock milking machine is what your heart (or penis) truly desires but you want to check out other options besides the Venus for Men, we have a handy list of the best automatic milking machines out there.
Looking to upgrade from your hand, but not sure you want to splash out that kind of cash?
Maybe a blowjob simulator is what you need to test the waters first. They’re cheaper than milking machines, but as with most things in life, you get what you pay for and there is a significant dip in quality.
Some of these blowjob machines are electronic with all the gimmicks you can imagine, while others are purely manual and offer a variety of textures and tricks to keep things interesting.
For a roundup of the best blowjob machines, you can buy right now, check this article out.
Finally, it’s worth mentioning that you can buy custom receivers from Venus themselves for $55. I’ve used the receiver on its own as a manual masturbator and the custom fit makes it a solid choice. If something like a Fleshlight isn’t for you, the manual receiver is a decent alternative.
Long story short: this is the BEST male masturbator money can buy. I would recommend it for the fantastic sensations, seismic orgasms and high level of controllability and variability it offers.
The only downsides are that it’s not easy to carry around (not much good for taking on long trips), and the price which makes the Venus a serious investment rather than a “buy it, use it once a year and forget about it” kind of toy.