Three-way sex is a common fantasy for both men and women. So let’s dive deep into facts about women’s fantasies and try to answer: Do women like threesomes?
Threesomes are often portrayed as an ultimate male fantasy, but men aren’t the only ones interested in group sex. Studies find that a majority of women fantasize about threesomes, even if they’ve never had one.
Fantasies vary from person to person, but there are a few things that make threesomes more appealing and pleasurable for women. Of course, curiosity is the most common reason for group sex experimentation, so we’ll do our best to answer questions on how many women like threesomes, what they like, what they don’t like, and more.
Table of Contents
Here are some highlights from our research:
- A 2015 study found that 17.7% of women ages 25 to 29 had experienced a threesome at least once; this is the highest prevalence of any age group.
- A Canadian study found that over one-third (36.9%) of women have fantasized about having sex with two other women, but less than one-third (30.9%) had fantasized about sex with two men.
- Sexual minorities are more interested in having mixed-gender threesomes than heterosexuals.
- Only 1 in 5 (18%) women who have experienced threesomes claim to have initiated or suggested it.
- Women report that seeing men interact with each other sexually makes threesomes better, more comfortable, and more arousing.
How Common Are Threesomes Among Women?
How many women have had a threesome? Percentages vary from study to study, but it’s safe to say that at least 1 in 10 American women has experienced a threesome. Older generations weren’t as into it, so this number gets higher in younger age groups.
These studies show how many women have had a threesome:
- One study found that the following percentages of Americans have experienced a threesome: (PLOS One, 2017)1
- Past month – 0.7% of Americans
- Past year – 2.3% of Americans
- Lifetime – 13.9% of Americans
- Another study found that 30% of respondents had been involved in at least one mixed-gender threesome (MGT) before. (Psychology Today, 2020)2
- A study of American adults found that only 8% of women reported having an MGT experience. (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2017)3
- However, different studies have suggested that 29% of women have been involved in an MGT. (Psychology Today, 2020)2
- A 2015 study found the following percentages of women who’ve experienced an MGT by age group: (PLOS One, 2017)1
- 18-24 years old
- Past month – 0.0%
- Past year – 0.0%
- Lifetime – 2.4%
- 25-29 years old
- Past month – 3.5%
- Past year – 6.1%
- Lifetime – 17.7%
- 30-39 years old
- Past month – 0.7%
- Past year – 2.2%
- Lifetime – 12.5%
- 40-49 years old
- Past month – 0.0%
- Past year – 0.7%
- Lifetime – 14.3%
- 50-59 years old
- Past month – 0.4%
- Past year – 1.0%
- Lifetime – 13.7%
- 60-69 years old
- Past month – 0.0%
- Past year – 1.1%
- Lifetime – 4.7%
- 70+ years old
- Past month – 0.0%
- Past year – 0.0%
- Lifetime – 3.1%
- Total women
- Past month – 0.6%
- Past year – 1.5%
- Lifetime – 10.3%
- 18-24 years old
- Women aged 25 to 29 are most likely to have had a threesome, with 17.7% reporting an MGT experience. (PLOS One, 2017)1
- 19% of American 18 to 24-year-olds say they’re interested in having a threesome now, with the percentage rising to 27% for those in their 30s and 40s. (Sex & Psychology, 2021)4
Do Women Want to Have Threesomes?
While they’re less likely to initiate a threesome, anywhere from one-third of women to 87% of women fantasize about it. These fantasies vary, however, and don’t always look like the “porn version” of a threeway.
These studies show how interested women are in threesomes.
- One study found that 81% of respondents had some degree of interest in a threesome. (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2021)5
- 23% of Americans said they were more interested in a threesome than they were before the pandemic, 29% reported no change in their interest, and 49% said they were less interested. (Sex & Psychology, 2021)4
- 13% of women and 33% of men reported being more interested in an MGT.
- One study found that women rated threesomes in the following percentages: (PLOS One, 2017)1
- Very appealing – 2.5%
- Somewhat appealing – 8.6%
- Not appealing – 12.1%
- Not at all appealing – 76.9%
- Of women who had experienced a threesome before, only 18% said that they suggested or initiated it. (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
- One survey found that 87% of female respondents said they had fantasized about sex with multiple partners. (The Guardian, 2020)7
- A Canadian study found that 36.9% of women have fantasized about sex with two other women. (The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 2015)8
- The same study found that only 30.9% of women had fantasized about sex with two men. (The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 2015)8
- Group sex can spice up banal sexual routines and keep people interested and aroused; it adds novelty and excitement to sex. (Kiro 7, 2018)9
Best Threesome Sex Positions
Nervous about your first threesome? If you’re wondering what moves to make in your first three-person game of naked twister, we’ve got just the thing for you.
Here’s a quick list of suggestions on sexual positions to use in MMF or MFF threesomes.
- These are some of the best sexual positions for male-male-female (MMF) threesomes: (School of Squirt, 2022)10
- The Oral Overload
- Technique:
- Have the woman sit on a chair or at the edge of a bed and push her legs apart. The first man kneels on the floor between her legs and goes down on her while the second man focuses on her erogenous zones, such as the nape of her neck, breasts, or inner thighs.
- Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure.
- Sex toys can be used for orgasms.
- Disadvantage:
- Positioning – the partner can cramp up.
- Technique:
- The Face Fuck
- Technique:
- The woman lies down on her back on the bed and rests her head on some pillows. She spreads her legs, and the first guy starts eating her pussy. The second guy straddles her with one knee on either side of her chest, below her armpits, and puts his penis in her mouth.
- Advantages:
- Control
- Pleasure
- Facials
- Disadvantage:
- Discomfort – the woman may not enjoy the second guy being in control of the depth of the blowjob.
- Technique:
- The Change-Up
- Technique:
- The classic change-up position calls for both guys to stand and to have the woman kneel between them. Then, she can fellate one guy while jacking off the other.
- Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Oral
- Role-play
- Disadvantage:
- Kneeling for an extended time can be uncomfortable
- Technique:
- The Peeping Tom
- Technique:
- The woman starts to have sex with one of the men in any sex position they choose. The second man watches and pleasures himself.
- Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Voyeurism
- Disadvantage:
- Stimulation – this position lacks the mutual stimulation that other threesome positions offer.
- Technique:
- The Doggy Blowjob
- Technique:
- The first guy lies on his back, and the woman starts giving him a blowjob on her hands and knees. The second guy kneels behind the woman and has sex with her from behind.
- Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Voyeurism
- Extra pleasure
- Disadvantages:
- Difficult
- If the second guy thrusts too forcefully into the woman, it can make it difficult for her to fellate the first guy.
- Crowded
- It can be crowded for the second guy
- Difficult
- Technique:
- The Tower Bridge
- Technique:
- The woman kneels in the doggy style, and the first man penetrates her from behind. Then, she gives the second guy a blowjob.
- Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Wild action
- Control
- Disadvantage:
- Discomfort
- Technique:
- The Double Stuff
- Technique:
- The girl starts riding cowgirl on the first guy. The second guy kneels behind her and enters her. If finding a spot for his knees proves challenging, he can try straddling her hips and crouching down to penetrate her. This gives him a better range of motion for thrusting but requires more strength and better balance.
- Advantages:
- Ultimate fantasy
- Beginner-friendly
- Disadvantage:
- Limits – not everyone is open to anal sex
- Technique:
- The Sex Sandwich
- Technique:
- This sexy move calls for the first guy to lie on his stomach and for the woman to lie on his back. They spread their legs and let the second man kneel behind them. This erotic vista presents him with potentially three holes to penetrate; he can enter the woman vaginally or anally or penetrate the man anally.
- Advantages:
- Variety
- Simultaneous orgasm
- Disadvantage:
- Safety – always change condoms when moving from one hole to another or from one partner to another.
- Technique:
- The Anal Eat Out
- Technique:
- Similar to the doggy blowjob, except the woman is lying on her back on the bed, and the first guy is eating her out. She places a few cushions under her head and spreads her legs. The second guy kneels behind the first and penetrates him anally.
- Advantages:
- P-spot pleasure
- They get to experience strong prostate stimulation
- Ease of access
- P-spot pleasure
- Disadvantage:
- Discomfort
- This position isn’t suitable for guys who aren’t bisexual or curious.
- Discomfort
- Technique:
- The Tag Team
- Technique:
- The woman lies on her back on the bed, and the man enters her, bringing her legs up as he penetrates her. The second guy kneels over her head and enjoys a blowjob in the face fuck position.
- Advantages:
- Limited contact
- This position is great if the two men don’t want too much contact during the threesome.
- Oral – for women who enjoy giving head.
- Limited contact
- Disadvantage:
- Challenging – the thrusting action can make giving a blowjob challenging
- Technique:
- The Oral Overload
- These are some of the best sexual positions for male-female-female (MFF) threesomes: (School of Squirt, 2022)10
- The Daisy Petal
- Technique:
- One woman sits on a chair or at the edge of a bed and spreads her legs. The guy kneels on the floor between her legs and starts eating her out. The second woman lavishes attention on the first woman’s erogenous zones, such as the nape of her neck, breasts, and inner thighs.
- Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure
- Toy-tastic – sex toys can be used for orgasm
- Disadvantage:
- Stimulation
- Only one person at a time is being stimulated.
- Stimulation
- Technique:
- The Emmanuel Blowjob
- Technique:
- The man lies on his back on the bed, and the first woman straddles his face. She places her knees on either side of his head and face fucks him while he holds her thighs. The second woman lies on her stomach and starts giving the guy a blowjob.
- Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure
- Control – the top partner gets a lot of control over how much pleasure they receive.
- Disadvantages:
- Timing – this position doesn’t let everyone receive pleasure at the same time.
- Gagging – the person on top may trigger the gag reflex of the bottom person.
- Technique:
- The Daisy Chain
- Technique:
- The Daisy Chain is a variation of the classic sideways 69 positions, except with three people performing oral on each other at the same time. The first woman lies on her side, and the man lies with his body perpendicular to hers. The man lifts her top leg upwards and starts eating her pussy. The second woman nuzzles into the man’s groin and starts giving him a blowjob. She brings her hips around until the first woman can start eating her out.
- Advantages:
- Giving and receiving – this is the only oral sex position where all three partners can give and receive pleasure at the same time.
- Disadvantage:
- Overwhelming – simultaneous stimulation and giving oral sex can be distracting.
- Technique:
- Double Oral
- Technique:
- The classic double oral position often has the guy standing while both women kneel and perform fellatio. They can fellate his penis simultaneously, or one can focus on his balls or anus while the other focuses on his penis.
- Advantages:
- Variation – the double oral position offers several variations from tame to outrageous.
- Balance – with so many variations to explore, you can switch over until everyone has taken a piece of the action.
- Disadvantage:
- Unrealistic – a two-mouthed blowjob can be unrealistic
- Technique:
- The Voyeur
- Technique:
- The man and first woman start to have sex in any position of their choosing. Then, the second woman can masturbate and pleasure herself while watching.
- Advantages:
- Beginner-friendly
- Self-pleasure – the voyeur in this position can finger themselves or use a toy.
- Disadvantage:
- Passion-killer – Someone sitting and passively watching can make things seem sad and boring.
- Technique:
- The Doggy Train
- Technique:
- The man and the first woman start to have sex in the doggy-style position. The second woman then goes to her knees and starts receiving oral sex from the first woman.
- Advantages:
- Pleasure
- Satisfaction
- Thrilling
- Disadvantage:
- Discomfort
- The person in the middle position may find your mouth or teeth slamming into the person they’re giving head to.
- Discomfort
- Technique:
- The Deluxe Doggy
- Technique:
- With the man and woman having sex doggy style, the woman performs oral sex on the second woman who lies on her back.
- Advantages:
- Oral sex
- Variety
- Double penetration
- Disadvantage:
- Risk of injury – the middle person being penetrated while giving oral sex should be careful about being slammed forward and injuring the receiver.
- Technique:
- The Deluxe 69
- Technique:
- Both women go into the classic 69 position and start pleasuring each other. Then, the man kneels behind the woman and penetrates her vaginally or anally.
- Advantages:
- Extra pleasure – the lower partner can help stimulate the top partner in many ways, with their fingers or even a toy.
- Variety – this position has several winning variations such as girl-on-top and pegging.
- Disadvantages:
- Comfort – the thrusting partner, usually the man, has to be careful not to pound downwards into the lower person’s face.
- Balance – this position requires a lot of juggling and balancing.
- Technique:
- The Double Cowgirl
- Technique:
- The man and woman have sex in the cowgirl position. While they are having sex, the second woman sits on the man’s face, and he starts eating her pussy.
- Advantages:
- Satisfaction – while in this position, both women can lean forward to kiss and stimulate each other, adding additional layers of pleasure.
- Extra connection – periodically stop and check in with the guy, maybe kissing his mouth or nipples to create an extra special connection.
- Customization – as both women are on top, they can turn to the sides or turn around to get a different angle of stimulation.
- Disadvantage:
- None.
- Technique:
- The Magic O
- Technique:
- In the Magic O position, both women lie on top of each other and start having sex in the missionary position. They can use their fingers or a strap-on dildo if they want to have penetrative sex or simply lie on top of each other and kiss. The man straddles both of his partners and enters the woman on top from behind.
- Advantages:
- Variations
- Extra stimulation – women might enjoy nipple play, clit stimulation, or rimming.
- Disadvantages:
- Unrealistic – this position might be a little too difficult for the lower partner.
- Tricky – if you’re interested in double penetration, it can be tricky to figure out where all the knees go.
- Technique:
- The Daisy Petal
What Type of Threesome Is the Most Popular?
Men can be a lot more scared of same-sex experimentation than women, so it’s no surprise that male-female-female threesomes are the most popular type.
Women, however, don’t seem to be as excited about them.
- One study found that of those who had experienced a threesome, 26% had tried both MMF and MFF threesomes. (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2017)3
- 51% said they’ve only tried MFF threesomes.
- Only 17% said they had tried MMF threesomes.
- One study asked men and women about their level of interest in threesomes on a scale of 1 to 7, with the following results: (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2021)5
- MMF
- Men – 3.74 (average score of interest on a scale from 1 to 7)
- Women – 3.80
- MFF
- Men – 5.24
- Women – 3.65
- MMF
- Of every dynamic surveyed, women were least excited about an MFF threesome (average interest score of 2.5 out of 7) and only slightly more excited (2.6) about an MMF threesome. (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2017)3
- Of people who’ve had at least one MGT, they were more likely (39%) to have experienced a male-female-female (MFF) threesome than a male-male-female (MMF) threesome (24%). (Psychology Today, 2020)2
- 32% of respondents said they had engaged in both MFF and MMF threesomes. (Psychology Today, 2020)2
Why Do Women Participate in Threesomes?
Most sexual experimentation comes from curiosity, and group sex is no exception. About 1 in 5 people say it “just happened.”
Reasons for experimenting with threesomes vary, but many women want to see men interacting with each other sexually. Here’s a look at the data.
- One survey of 85% female and 15% male respondents reported the following reasons for having a threesome: (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
- Curiosity – 31%
- Just happened – 21%
- Explore sexuality – 10%
- Please my partner – 10%
- Live out a fantasy – 10%
- To spice things up – 7%
- A study of 16 women who’ve engaged in threesomes found the following data: (Psychology and Sexuality, 2018)11
- 9 women wanted to have an MMF threesome, and 3 of them had had one before.
- They found it very arousing to see men interacting sexually – even if they were just watching. Porn use influenced the MMF threesome desire for some women.
- For 8 of these women, the sexual interaction of men was a key factor in their pleasure and enjoyment in an MMF threesome.
- 2 women with MMF threesome experience said that it’s more comfortable when all three people are sexually involved with each other.
- One of these women suggested that MMF threesomes were more difficult when the men did not interact sexually with each other.
- 9 women wanted to have an MMF threesome, and 3 of them had had one before.
Common Threesome Misconceptions
There are many myths and misconceptions about threesomes, but we’re here to clear all that up for you.
Threesomes are about pleasing EVERYONE involved – not just a man. They don’t usually happen the same way it looks in porn, and they often take a lot of trust and planning.
- Here are some common myths and misconceptions about threesomes: (She Explores Life, 2022)12
- Threesomes are extreme, and only very sexually liberal people are having them.
- Only liberal or sexually promiscuous people want to have a threesome.
- They are just like what is portrayed in porn.
- Women only have threesomes to satisfy a man’s needs.
- All bisexual women want to have a threesome.
- They all consist of female-female-male dynamics.
- Threesomes lack emotional intimacy.
- You can have a successful threesome without boundaries or conversations.
- Only men initiate and drive threesomes – or that men want threesomes more than women.
- Only bored married couples want threesomes.
- Everyone who is sexually adventurous wants to have a threesome.
- A threesome is a form of polyamory.
- Everyone would enjoy a threesome.
- Threesomes are only about satisfying a man.
- Threesomes are easy to arrange and just happen.
Why Are Some Women Uncomfortable With Threesomes?
For women, a threesome can feel intimidating or objectifying, especially if she’s being pressured into it. As a result, some women seek out group sex for that feeling, and others avoid it.
MMF threesomes can be especially intimidating, particularly if the woman doesn’t know or trust the two men.
- One study found that 5 out of 16 participants felt intimidated and concerned about an MMF threesome. (Psychology and Sexuality, 2018)11
- They said that they couldn’t defend themselves from the two men, though they looked forward to being used.
- They felt that simultaneous stimulation from both men might be overwhelming.
- MMF threesomes are often aggressive in pornography, which led the women to believe that their experiences would be aggressive.
- One participant said that she was worried about her safety in an MMF threesome and would be more comfortable if the men interacted sexually with each other. (Psychology and Sexuality, 2018)11
- Of men and women who have experienced a threesome, the average satisfaction score for women was only 4.89. For men, the average satisfaction score was 9.2. (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
How Do People Choose a Third?
After marriage, choosing a third is the second-most important choice in any couple’s sexual journey. Some couples prefer a stranger, while others seek out someone they know and trust.
- One study asked people who had experienced a threesome how they chose a third; (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
- A close friend of my partner – 10.30%
- A close friend of mine – 17.20%
- An acquaintance of both – 27.60%
- An acquaintance of my partner – 17.20%
- An acquaintance of mine – 13.80%
- Stranger – 3.40%
- Another study found that some women looked for a man who would have sex with both her and her male partner. (Psychology & Sexuality, 2018)
Threesomes and Relationships
You might think that threesomes put a serious strain on relationships, but this isn’t usually the case. Nearly half of those in relationships who had threesomes reported no effect, and some even said it brought them closer together.
- Almost 4 out of 5 people who’ve experienced an MGT are in sexually exclusive relationships. (Psychology Today, 2020)2
- One study found that having a threesome affected a relationship in the following ways: (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
- We broke up – 7%
- Strain in the relationship – 14%
- Brought us closer to the partner – 17%
- No effect – 48%
- Women demonstrate more jealousy than men toward threesomes. (Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016)6
How Do People View Threesomes?
Like most things sexual, there’s a significant double-standard between society’s views on men and women engaging in threesomes.
Women are more likely than men to be rated negatively and less likely to be rated positively for being involved in three-way sex.
- One study surveyed Americans on threesome activity using a scale of 1 to 5 (1 being not at all derogatory or favorable, 5 being very much so). They were asked how “favorable” and how “derogatory” the act was with the following results: (Sex Roles, 2008)13
- Derogatory (1 being not derogatory at all, 5 being very derogatory):
- Woman having a threesome with:
- 2 opposite gender others (MMF) – 3.40
- A member of each gender (MFF) – 2.71
- Man having a threesome with:
- 2 opposite gender others (MFF) – 2.43
- A member of each gender (MMF) – 2.48
- Woman having a threesome with:
- Favorable:
- Woman having a threesome with:
- 2 opposite gender others (MMF) – 3.03
- A member of each gender (MFF) – 3.32
- Man
- 2 opposite gender others (MFF) – 4.10
- A member of each gender (MMF) – 3.29
- Woman having a threesome with:
- Derogatory (1 being not derogatory at all, 5 being very derogatory):
Who’s Interested in Threesomes?
Women are certainly interested in threesomes, but they aren’t the only ones. General surveys find that many people want to try both types of threeway. Gender and sexual minorities are more open to the idea than heterosexuals.
- One study was conducted on a sample of university students and a general population sample to determine people’s interest in a mixed-gender threesome (MGT): (Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2021)5
- Average interest levels (on a scale from 1 to 7) of students and the general sample on MGTs:
- MMF
- Student sample – 2.68
- General sample – 3.96
- FFM
- Student sample – 3.21
- General sample – 4.53
- MMF
- Average interest levels of heterosexuals and sexual minorities (lesbian, gay, bisexual) on MGTs:
- MMF
- Heterosexual — 3.13
- Sexual minority — 4.63
- FFM
- Heterosexual — 3.98
- Sexual minority — 4.82
- MMF
- Average interest levels (on a scale from 1 to 7) of students and the general sample on MGTs:
Conclusion
Three-way sex is a common and exciting fantasy for both men and women. Research suggests that a large portion of women are at least interested in the idea, and many have already tried it.
Curiosity is the main reason women try threesomes, but intimidation is a significant reason many don’t. A higher number of women fantasize about threesomes with three women, as opposed to two men and one woman.
However, sexual interaction between men is a common factor that makes women more comfortable and excited about group sex. It’s less threatening and more pleasurable for everyone involved.
Relationships can be strained by threesomes, but they’re usually unaffected or strengthened. People view women who have threesomes more negatively than men who have threesomes, but consensual group sex is a beautiful thing – no matter who’s involved.
As society becomes more sex-positive, threesomes may become more female-centric, comfortable, and accepted.
Footnotes
- PLOS One, 2017. A study on the sexual behaviors of a nationally representative sample of 2,021 American adults.
- Psychology Today, 2020. An article on the prevalence of threesomes in adults authored by Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D.
- Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2017. A study on the interests, attitudes, and experiences of multi-person sex using data from 274 American adults.
- Sex & Psychology, 2021. An article on the effect of the COVID-19 pandemic on attitudes toward sex parties and threesomes.
- Archives of Sexual Behavior, 2021. A two-sample study on the sexual attitudes and practices of 1,573 total North American adults.
- Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2016. A study of the sexual attitudes toward threesomes in 196 undergraduate students.
- The Guardian, 2020. An article on the psychology of threesomes using data from a survey of 4,175 Americans.
- The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 2015. A study on sexual fantasies and their prevalence in 1,516 Canadian adults.
- Kiro 7, 2018. An article on the results of a sexual fantasy survey conducted on over 4,000 Americans.
- School of Squirt, 2022. An article on the best and hottest threesome positions to experiment with for MMF and MFF threesomes.
- Psychology and Sexuality, 2018. A study on 16 women’s personal experiences with mixed-sex threesomes and their attitudes toward them.
- She Explores Life, 2022. An article about the female perspective on threesomes, common myths about threesomes, and more.
- Sex Roles, 2008. A study on sex acts that are common and uncommon using data from two samples totaling 225 American respondents.