Three-way sex is a common fantasy for both men and women. So let’s dive deep into facts about women’s fantasies and try to answer: Do women like threesomes?
Threesomes are often portrayed as an ultimate male fantasy, but men aren’t the only ones interested in group sex. Studies find that a majority of women fantasize about threesomes, even if they’ve never had one.
Fantasies vary from person to person, but there are a few things that make threesomes more appealing and pleasurable for women. Of course, curiosity is the most common reason for group sex experimentation, so we’ll do our best to answer questions on how many women like threesomes, what they like, what they don’t like, and more.
Here are some highlights from our research:
- A 2015 study found that 17.7% of women ages 25 to 29 had experienced a threesome at least once; this is the highest prevalence of any age group.
- A Canadian study found that over one-third (36.9%) of women have fantasized about having sex with two other women, but less than one-third (30.9%) had fantasized about sex with two men.
- Sexual minorities are more interested in having mixed-gender threesomes than heterosexuals.
- Only 1 in 5 (18%) women who have experienced threesomes claim to have initiated or suggested it.
- Women report that seeing men interact with each other sexually makes threesomes better, more comfortable, and more arousing.
How Common Are Threesomes Among Women?
How many women have had a threesome? Percentages vary from study to study, but it’s safe to say that at least 1 in 10 American women has experienced a threesome. Older generations weren’t as into it, so this number gets higher in younger age groups.
These studies show how many women have had a threesome:
One study found that the following percentages of Americans have experienced a threesome:
Another study found that 30% of respondents had been involved in at least one mixed-gender threesome (MGT) before.
A study of American adults found that only 8% of women reported having an MGT experience.
However, different studies have suggested that 29% of women have been involved in an MGT.
A 2015 study found the following percentages of women who’ve experienced an MGT by age group:
Women aged 25 to 29 are most likely to have had a threesome, with 17.7% reporting an MGT experience.
19% of American 18 to 24-year-olds say they’re interested in having a threesome now, with the percentage rising to 27% for those in their 30s and 40s.
Sources: PLOS One, Psychology Today, Archives of Sexual Behavior, Sex & Psychology
Do Women Want to Have Threesomes?
While they’re less likely to initiate a threesome, anywhere from one-third of women to 87% of women fantasize about it. These fantasies vary, however, and don’t always look like the “porn version” of a threeway.
These studies show how interested women are in threesomes.
One study found that 81% of respondents had some degree of interest in a threesome.
13% of women and 33% of men reported being more interested in an MGT.
One study found that women rated threesomes in the following percentages:
Of women who had experienced a threesome before, only 18% said that they suggested or initiated it.
One survey found that 87% of female respondents said they had fantasized about sex with multiple partners.
A Canadian study found that 36.9% of women have fantasized about sex with two other women.
The same study found that only 30.9% of women had fantasized about sex with two men.
Group sex can spice up banal sexual routines and keep people interested and aroused; it adds novelty and excitement to sex.
Sources: Archives of Sexual Behavior, Sex & Psychology, PLOS One, Journal of Positive Sexuality, The Guardian, The Journal of Sexual Medicine, Kiro 7
Best Threesome Sex Positions
Nervous about your first threesome? If you’re wondering what moves to make in your first three-person game of naked twister, we’ve got just the thing for you.
Here’s a quick list of suggestions on sexual positions to use in MMF or MFF threesomes.
These are some of the best sexual positions for male-male-female (MMF) threesomes:
Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure.
- Sex toys can be used for orgasms.
Disadvantages
- Positioning – the partner can cramp up.
Advantages:
- Control
- Pleasure
- Facials
Disadvantages
- Discomfort – the woman may not enjoy the second guy being in control of the depth of the blowjob.
Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Oral
- Role-play
Disadvantages
- Kneeling for an extended time can be uncomfortable
Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Voyeurism
Disadvantages
- Stimulation – this position lacks the mutual stimulation that other threesome positions offer.
Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Voyeurism
- Extra pleasure
Disadvantages
- Difficult – if the second guy thrusts too forcefully into the woman, it can make it difficult for her to fellate the first guy.
- Crowded – it can be crowded for the second guy
Advantages:
- Newbie-friendly
- Wild action
- Control
Disadvantages
- Discomfort
Advantages:
- Ultimate fantasy
- Beginner-friendly
Disadvantages
- Limits – not everyone is open to anal sex
Advantages:
- Variety
- Simultaneous orgasm
Disadvantages
- Safety – always change condoms when moving from one hole to another or from one partner to another.
Advantages:
- P-spot pleasure – they get to experience strong prostate stimulation.
- Ease of access
Disadvantages
- Discomfort – this position isn’t suitable for guys who aren’t bisexual or curious.
Advantages:
- Limited contact – this position is great if the two men don’t want too much contact during the threesome.
- Oral – for women who enjoy giving head.
Disadvantages
- Challenging – the thrusting action can make giving a blowjob challenging.
These are some of the best sexual positions for male-female-female (MFF) threesomes:
Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure
- Toy-tastic – sex toys can be used for orgasm
Disadvantages
- Stimulation – only one person at a time is being stimulated.
Advantages:
- Maximum pleasure
- Control – the top partner gets a lot of control over how much pleasure they receive.
Disadvantages
- Timing – this position doesn’t let everyone receive pleasure at the same time.
- Gagging – the person on top may trigger the gag reflex of the bottom person.
Advantages:
- Giving and receiving – this is the only oral sex position where all three partners can give and receive pleasure at the same time.
Disadvantages
- Overwhelming – simultaneous stimulation and giving oral sex can be distracting.
Advantages:
- Variation – the double oral position offers several variations from tame to outrageous.
- Balance – with so many variations to explore, you can switch over until everyone has taken a piece of the action.
Disadvantages
- Unrealistic – a two-mouthed blowjob can be unrealistic.
Advantages:
- Beginner-friendly
- Self-pleasure – the voyeur in this position can finger themselves or use a toy.
Disadvantages
- Passion-killer – someone sitting and passively watching can make things seem sad and boring.
Advantages:
- Pleasure
- Satisfaction
- Thrilling
Disadvantages
- Discomfort – the person in the middle position may find your mouth or teeth slamming into the person they’re giving head to.
Advantages:
- Oral sex
- Variety
- Double penetration
Disadvantages
- Risk of injury – the middle person being penetrated while giving oral sex should be careful about being slammed forward and injuring the receiver.
Advantages:
- Extra pleasure – the lower partner can help stimulate the top partner in many ways, with their fingers or even a toy.
- Variety – this position has several winning variations such as girl-on-top and pegging.
Disadvantages
- Comfort – the thrusting partner, usually the man, has to be careful not to pound downwards into the lower person’s face.
- Balance – this position requires a lot of juggling and balancing.
Advantages:
- Satisfaction – while in this position, both women can lean forward to kiss and stimulate each other, adding additional layers of pleasure.
- Extra connection – periodically stop and check in with the guy, maybe kissing his mouth or nipples to create an extra special connection.
- Customization – as both women are on top, they can turn to the sides or turn around to get a different angle of stimulation.
Disadvantages
- None
Advantages:
- Variations
- Extra stimulation – women might enjoy nipple play, clit stimulation, or rimming.
Disadvantages
- Unrealistic – this position might be a little too difficult for the lower partner.
- Tricky – if you’re interested in double penetration, it can be tricky to figure out where all the knees go.
What Type of Threesome Is the Most Popular?
Men can be a lot more scared of same-sex experimentation than women, so it’s no surprise that male-female-female threesomes are the most popular type.
Women, however, don’t seem to be as excited about them.
One study found that of those who had experienced a threesome, 26% had tried both MMF and MFF threesomes.
One study asked men and women about their level of interest in threesomes on a scale of 1 to 7, with the following results:
Of every dynamic surveyed, women were least excited about an MFF threesome (average interest score of 2.5 out of 7) and only slightly more excited (2.6) about an MMF threesome
Of people who’ve had at least one MGT, they were more likely (39%) to have experienced a male-female-female (MFF) threesome than a male-male-female (MMF) threesome (24%).
32% of respondents said they had engaged in both MFF and MMF threesomes.
Sources: Archives of Sexual Behavior, Archives of Sexual Behavior, Psychology Today,
Why Do Women Participate in Threesomes?
Most sexual experimentation comes from curiosity, and group sex is no exception. About 1 in 5 people say it “just happened.”
Reasons for experimenting with threesomes vary, but many women want to see men interacting with each other sexually. Here’s a look at the data.
One survey of 85% female and 15% male respondents reported the following reasons for having a threesome:
A study of 16 women who’ve engaged in threesomes found the following data:
9 women wanted to have an MMF threesome, and 3 of them had had one before.
- They found it very arousing to see men interacting sexually – even if they were just watching. Porn use influenced the MMF threesome desire for some women.
- For 8 of these women, the sexual interaction of men was a key factor in their pleasure and enjoyment in an MMF threesome.
2 women with MMF threesome experience said that it’s more comfortable when all three people are sexually involved with each other.
- One of these women suggested that MMF threesomes were more difficult when the men did not interact sexually with each other.
Sources: Psychology and Sexuality, Journal of Positive Sexuality
Common Threesome Misconceptions
There are many myths and misconceptions about threesomes, but we’re here to clear all that up for you.
Threesomes are about pleasing EVERYONE involved – not just a man. They don’t usually happen the same way it looks in porn, and they often take a lot of trust and planning.
Here are some common myths and misconceptions about threesomes:
- Threesomes are extreme, and only very sexually liberal people are having them.
- Only liberal or sexually promiscuous people want to have a threesome.
- They are just like what is portrayed in porn.
- Women only have threesomes to satisfy a man’s needs.
- All bisexual women want to have a threesome.
- They all consist of female-female-male dynamics.
- Threesomes lack emotional intimacy.
- You can have a successful threesome without boundaries or conversations.
- Only men initiate and drive threesomes – or that men want threesomes more than women.
- Only bored married couples want threesomes.
- Everyone who is sexually adventurous wants to have a threesome.
- A threesome is a form of polyamory.
- Everyone would enjoy a threesome.
- Threesomes are only about satisfying a man.
- Threesomes are easy to arrange and just happen.
Source: She Explores Life
Why Are Some Women Uncomfortable With Threesomes?
For women, a threesome can feel intimidating or objectifying, especially if she’s being pressured into it. As a result, some women seek out group sex for that feeling, and others avoid it.
MMF threesomes can be especially intimidating, particularly if the woman doesn’t know or trust the two men.
One study found that 5 out of 16 participants felt intimidated and concerned about an MMF threesome.
- They said that they couldn’t defend themselves from the two men, though they looked forward to being used.
- They felt that simultaneous stimulation from both men might be overwhelming.
- MMF threesomes are often aggressive in pornography, which led the women to believe that their experiences would be aggressive.
One participant said that she was worried about her safety in an MMF threesome and would be more comfortable if the men interacted sexually with each other.
Of men and women who have experienced a threesome, the average satisfaction score for women was only 4.89. For men, the average satisfaction score was 9.2.
Sources: Psychology and Sexuality, Journal of Positive Sexuality
How Do People Choose a Third?
After marriage, choosing a third is the second-most important choice in any couple’s sexual journey. Some couples prefer a stranger, while others seek out someone they know and trust.
One study asked people who had experienced a threesome how they chose a third;
Another study found that some women looked for a man who would have sex with both her and her male partner.
Source: Journal of Positive Sexuality
Threesomes and Relationships
You might think that threesomes put a serious strain on relationships, but this isn’t usually the case. Nearly half of those in relationships who had threesomes reported no effect, and some even said it brought them closer together.
Almost 4 out of 5 people who’ve experienced an MGT are in sexually exclusive relationships.
One study found that having a threesome affected a relationship in the following ways:
Women demonstrate more jealousy than men toward threesomes.
Sources: Psychology Today, Journal of Positive Sexuality,
How Do People View Threesomes?
Like most things sexual, there’s a significant double-standard between society’s views on men and women engaging in threesomes.
Women are more likely than men to be rated negatively and less likely to be rated positively for being involved in three-way sex.
One study surveyed Americans on threesome activity using a scale of 1 to 5 (1 being not at all derogatory or favorable, 5 being very much so). They were asked how “favorable” and how “derogatory” the act was with the following results:
Derogatory having threesome with (1 being not derogatory at all, 5 being very derogatory):
Favorable having threesome with:
Source: Sex Roles
Who’s Interested in Threesomes?
Women are certainly interested in threesomes, but they aren’t the only ones. General surveys find that many people want to try both types of threeway. Gender and sexual minorities are more open to the idea than heterosexuals.
One study was conducted on a sample of university students and a general population sample to determine people’s interest in a mixed-gender threesome (MGT): Average interest levels (on a scale from 1 to 7) of students and the general sample on MGTs:
Average interest levels of heterosexuals and sexual minorities (lesbian, gay, bisexual) on MGTs:
Source: Archives of Sexual Behavior,
Conclusion
Three-way sex is a common and exciting fantasy for both men and women. Research suggests that a large portion of women are at least interested in the idea, and many have already tried it.
Curiosity is the main reason women try threesomes, but intimidation is a significant reason many don’t. A higher number of women fantasize about threesomes with three women, as opposed to two men and one woman.
However, sexual interaction between men is a common factor that makes women more comfortable and excited about group sex. It’s less threatening and more pleasurable for everyone involved.
Relationships can be strained by threesomes, but they’re usually unaffected or strengthened. People view women who have threesomes more negatively than men who have threesomes, but consensual group sex is a beautiful thing – no matter who’s involved.
As society becomes more sex-positive, threesomes may become more female-centric, comfortable, and accepted.